Read My Book!

11/9/19 — Unless I’ve already read something by you (or someone you’ve represented/published), I’m just not going to say yes to anything for the rest of 2019. And I’m not sure about January, to be honest. If I’ve already read something by you (or someone you’ve represented/published), hit me up — you get moved to the beginning of the line if I can make it work.

You’ve written a book? Congrats! You want me to read it? First—thanks, I’m flattered. Second, I’m probably game*—if there’s a date you want it done by? Well . . . we’ll see what we can work out. Otherwise, it’s FIFO. I prefer Kindle-friendly books (well, I prefer hardcopy, but I know that’s a lot to ask, so—Kindle-friendly), but can handle ePub. If you ask nicely, I might read a PDF (I don’t like the way they look on my e-Readers and have to spend time resizing every page so it doesn’t hurt my eyes—that’s time I’d rather spend reading). I’d very much appreciate it if you’d send a cover image with your book.

If you’re an agent, a publicist, a publisher and you want me to consider someone’s book—same rules.

I’ll read whatever as far as genre goes (you’ll have to sell me hard on a Zombie book, Romance or Self-Help): just make your pitch interesting; try not to let your form’s grammar/spelling make me question your writing ability (I don’t care how cool the book is, it won’t “peak” my interest—and yes, I’ve been told that multiple times); answer the questions I ask (“when” and “what” mean very different things); and come across like someone nice to work with. Also, once I say, “yes,” don’t hit me with a list of demands, you make me dislike myself for agreeing to read your book—resulting in a miserable experience for me (which makes it difficult for me to say nice things about your book). Actually, after a couple of problems in 2019 (one un-named author in particular) I’ve decided that if you start demanding things from me after I say yes, I’m going to not read/stop reading your book (even if I’m loving it at the 90% mark). It’s petty, but it’s my blog and I’m tired of not enjoying it.

I do go out of my way to be fair and reasonable in what I say about a book — but I do give less than rave reviews frequently. I know many book bloggers won’t post negative—or even “meh”—reviews. I’m not one of them. There are two reasons for this: any review (I’m assured) on Goodreads, Amazon, or anywhere else helps your metrics no matter what it says; moreover, if I spend the time reading your book, I’m getting a post out of it. I do prefer to like things though, so you’re going to get a lot of slack from me.

Unless you specify otherwise, a few hours after posting here, I’ll cross-post to Amazon, Goodreads and BookLikes (and other places you might want me to).

* This is subject to change at a moment’s notice if I can’t keep up or something.