Tag: 3 1/2 Stars Page 13 of 43

Dead Man in a Ditch (Audiobook) by Luke Arnold: A Murdered Elf, An Old Friend, and a Hint of Magic

Dead Man in a DitchDead Man in a Ditch

by Luke Arnold

DETAILS:
Series: The Fetch Phillips Archives, #2
Publisher: Orbit
Publication Date: October 9, 2020
Format: Unabridged Audiobook
Length:  11 hrs., 51 min.
Read Date: February 11-15, 2022
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What’s Dead Man in a Ditch About?

Fetch, Man for Hire, has two clients/cases this time out.

First, the police want his help—they have a corpse that appears to have been killed by magic. They’re not broadcasting this idea, but that’s the best theory they have. They figure this is more up Fetch’s alley than theirs, they can’t officially hire him, but they’ll make sure that there’s a solid reward ready for him if he can bring them answers.

The other case involves an older elf—her husband is missing, and is probably dead. She wants Fetch to figure out who killed him—even better, if Fetch can tell her why there are debt collectors from the wrong side of the tracks sniffing around…

There’s not a lot of overlap in these cases, beyond the suggestion that there’s still a little magic in the world, despite what everyone knows/assumes. Maybe this time Fetch will find the thing everyone wants.

Too On the Nose

There’s a lot of material that’s a commentary on the presence, use, and abuse of guns in the real world. Arnold was not subtle at all—I’m not saying he should’ve been, but it would’ve been a bit easier to take if he had. I really don’t like authors taking a moment to do a PSA for whatever their cause is in the middle of a book.

Now, if they can work it in subtly? I don’t mind, in fact, I’m frequently impressed by it (whether or not I agree with them). But this was a tad too blatant for me.

The Narration

There’s got to be an advantage in narrating the audiobook for your own novel—you know how the strange names are pronounced already, you know exactly what tone is called for in each scene, and so on. On the other hand, you probably have to resist the impulse to do one more edit on each passage.

If you happen to be a pretty experienced actor, that has to be all the better.

Basically, I’m saying that Arnold is a perfect narrator for this and he did a bang-up job of it.

So, what did I think about Dead Man in a Ditch?

I thought I liked this novel more than the first in the series—I actually still do, but I’m rating this lower (I would like to ask 2020 me a couple of questions). Focusing on the present, even if the past looms large over the present, allows Fetch’s cases to mean more and be developed in a better, fuller sense.

I’m intrigued by the direction that Fetch seemed to be headed at the end here (although, I kind of thought that’s where he was headed already), but let’s never mind that.

I loved Fetch’s inner monologues, the voice is fantastic and I could listen/read it all day. I’m not quite as on board with the story—it’s good, just slow. Still, I’m glad I listened to this, and expect most fantasy/PI fans will be, too—particularly if they’re fans of both genres.

I’m just going to repeat what I said last time, because it still applies (maybe more than last time). Do I recommend this book? Oh yeah. You’ll probably like it more than I did (I’m a little worried about hitting “publish” on this, as I know I’m one of the less enthusiastic readers of this). And even if you don’t, you’ll be just as impressed as I am with Arnold’s imagination and skill.


3.5 Stars

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A Wizard’s Guide to Defensive Baking (Audiobook) by T. Kingfisher, Patricia Santomasso: If You’ve Ever Wondered How to Weaponize a Sourdough Starter, I’ve Got Just the Book for You

A Wizard's Guide to Defensive BakingA Wizard’s Guide to Defensive Baking

by T. Kingfisher, Patricia Santomasso (Narrator)

DETAILS:
Publisher: Tantor Audio
Publication Date: October 11, 2021
Format: Unabridged Audiobook
Length: 8 hrs., 30 min.
Read Date: February 2-3, 2022
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If you have ever prepared for a siege in two days, then you know what the next few days were like. If you haven’t, then you probably don’t. Well…a big formal wedding is about the same (and because we do cakes, I’ve been on the periphery of a few), except that if things go wrong in a siege you’ll all die horribly, and in formal weddings, the stakes are much higher.

What’s A Wizard’s Guide to Defensive Baking About?

Mona’s a 14-year-old orphan, working in her aunt’s bakery. She’s also a magic-user. Her forte is magic involving baked goods and dough. Sure, that seems like an odd thing to have as a focus of one’s magic abilities, but in this world, it really isn’t. One of Mona’s acquaintances can reanimate dead horses. Nothing else, just dead horses. I guess what I’m saying is that atypical magical specializations are typical for this world.

Mona isn’t exactly a powerhouse either, she possesses enough magic to do a few tricks (making gingerbread men dance) and give a little extra something to her baking—her aunt won’t let her rest on that and actually has to learn to be a good baker while she’s at it.

Despite not being that powerful, Mona finds herself targeted by someone who seems to be killing every mage they can find. One thing leads to another, as they tend to do, and soon Mona finds herself at the forefront of an effort to defend her Duchess and their city-state against an invading army.

Caveat Lector (or Auditor)

The very best thing about being a baker is watching somebody bite into a blueberry muffin or a fresh slice of sourdough dripping with butter and seeing them close their eyes and savor the taste. You’re making their lives better, just a little tiny bit.

You know the rule, never go grocery shopping when you’re hungry? That applies to this book, too. The number of breads, pastries, cookies, and other assorted baked goods described and celebrated in these pages is unusually high for a fantasy novel. But probably about par for a novel with the word “baking” in the title. If you’re hungry—especially if you’ve been restricting carbs for whatever reason—you’re going to be in trouble.

This is not a reason to avoid the book, it’s just a friendly heads up. Eat well before diving in, or have some good snacks on hand.

Patricia Santomasso

This isn’t one of those audiobooks where I’m going to say that the narration elevated the text—Kingfisher’s prose doesn’t need it. But I can easily imagine her doing that for other books.

That said, her narration practically oozes charm. I could’ve listened for twice as long and been just as entertained with her work. She infused Mona with the right combination of timidity, determination, and spunk (and, sure, fear) to bring her to life in the narration.

So, what did I think about A Wizard’s Guide to Defensive Baking?

I’d picked this book up a handful of times over the last year or so, but hadn’t found the time to work it in. Then my library added the audiobook to their digital collection and that took care of that issue. I really should’ve made the time for this last year (or the year before).

In very many ways this was a pretty standard fantasy story, and most of the story beats were just what you’d think they would be. But I didn’t care about that for a second. The execution is what counts—and Kingfisher’s execution won the day. Add in the very different magic system (or at least a very different application of a magic system) and you’ve got yourself a humdinger.

A Wizard’s Guide had heart, charm, and humor—it wasn’t non-stop jokes, but the narrative voice could make you think it was. The moving and affecting parts were moving and affecting, and the rest of the time I was probably grinning. This was a completely entertaining way to spend a few hours, you should check it out.


3.5 Stars

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Ban This Book (Audiobook) by Alan Gratz, Bahni Turpin (Narrator): A Young Reader is Pushed into Action

Ban This BookBan This Book

by Alan Gratz, Bahni Turpin (Narrator)

DETAILS:
Publisher: Blackstone Audio
Publication Date: August 29, 2017
Format: Unabridged Audiobook
Length: 5 hrs., 17 min.
Read Date: February 1-2, 2022
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What’s Ban This Book About?

Amy Anne is a big reader—to those who don’t know her that well, that’s all they know about her. She spends a lot of time every day in her school library—they appear to have set certain rules because of her (there’s a limit to how often she can check out certain books in a row). One day she goes to check out her favorite book, From the Mixed-Up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler, yet again, but it’s not there. Not because someone checked it out, but because one mother of another fourth-grader has got the school board to remove it—and a few others—from the library.

Now, it’s been a few decades since I read From the Mixed-Up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler, but I don’t remember it really being the kind of book that ends up on banned lists. But maybe I’m naive—is this really a challenged book? I can understand why some groups want other books removed from required reading lists, etc.–I almost never agree, but I can see where someone might get the idea.

Also, I should note that this really does seem to be set in/around 2017 from some of the other titles, even if the book that sets the whole thing off is from 1968.

Amy Anne is livid, she’s confused, she’s bewildered—why would someone do this? She sets out to go to the next school board meeting, gets her parents to rearrange their schedule to get her there, writes up a statement, and then…is far too timid to read it, leaving the school librarian, Mrs. Jones, as the only opposition. (I’m less than impressed with her father’s reaction to this, but I understand it)

Amy Anne is mad at herself, mad at the school board, mad at that mother—and sets out to read every book on the list (although she changes her mind when she sees that one of them is a non-fiction work about s-e-x). A friend has access to one of the books, and she spends her savings on a couple of others. Apparently, Public Libraries aren’t an option? Her friends want to read those, and soon most of that challenged list is circulating in her social circle. Then the same mother gets another batch of books pulled—and Amy adds more to her list.

Eventually, she’s running a small, independent—and covert—lending library from her locker. Naturally, that can only last so long, or the book would be missing some conflict…and well, enough said about that.

The Role of Parents

The presence and role of parents in MG novels (YA novels, too) is tricky—especially when it comes to the protagonists doing things that aren’t approved of—for good or ill. Do you write the parents off somehow, do you make them incredibly authoritarian so that part of what the protagonists are rebelling against is that authority, do you get them to buy into/cheer on the activities? Those are, by and large, the options that authors seem to have to choose from. Few do what Gratz accomplished—you make them human, with regular strengths and flaws, supportive, but exercising actual authority in responsible ways.

The other aspect of parental authority in this book revolves around the reading material of the students. Amy Anne and Mrs. Jones are constantly repeating that parents should decide if their kids should read something for recreation. But the decision of one parent shouldn’t dictate what other kids can read. That’s an important distinction—and one this parent can get behind.

That Reminds Me:

Actually, Mrs. Jones and the kids support the idea that the librarian/school board/administration can choose to pull a book from circulation or not even let it start in the first place—but there’s a process. It shouldn’t just be one/a few parents demanding a book be removed—there needs to be consideration, deliberation, and thought involved. And then a book can be pulled—one at a time, after a process.

Gratz and his characters never call for an “all books are appropriate” approach, they just want it to be a careful process with input from various parties. I think that’s important to remember (and practice).

How About the Narration?

Bahni Turpin rocked this narration. I totally believed I was listening to a 4th grader recount the events of her life. She did a good job with the supporting characters, too—but she shined when she was giving us things from Amy Anne’s perspective. She captured the frustration of someone who was always fighting against her impulses to say what she wanted to say rather than what she thought was the right thing to say, or didn’t feel brave enough to do the right thing publicly. Yes, that’s clear in the text, but Turpin delivers it so that you don’t just know that’s what Amy Anne’s going through—you feel it and you believe it.

There’s a joy to Amy Anne and a sadness to her, and Turpin delivered the goods on both aspects.

I admit to a little confusion

Early on, Amy Anne rationalizes that it’s not the school lending them—these books haven’t been banned from the premises, it’s just that the school can’t provide them. A lot of the books in her library are privately owned, I don’t see why she gets in trouble for having and circulating them.

There are other, clear legal infractions involved—and I agree with the administration for coming down on her for that. But the rest? That feels a little wrong, and Amy Anne’s parents should have fought that.

So, what did I think about Ban This Book?

Beyond the message about banning books, this book is a celebration of what books can do—how they can inspire as well as entertain, comfort those who need it, rattle the perspective when necessary—to affect the reader in ways they can’t fully articulate or understand. All of that and more. The core of this book comes from the love Amy Anne has for some books, and that love grows to more as soon as she’s exposed to it.

I loved that—as well as the message about not allowing the conscience of one parent dictate to them all. The solution that Amy Anne and her friends come up with for the final encounter with the school board was pretty clever, and I really liked the way that Gratz set up and resolved the major hurdle to their plan.

Yes, it’s a little simple. Yes, the solution is a little pat and easy. Yes, the whole thing comes across like an after-school special (or whatever the contemporary equivalent is—I’d say a Disney Channel movie, but I guess that’s not a thing. A made-for-Disney+ movie?). But it’s not trying to be careful and nuanced, it’s a story directed at 8-11 year-olds (my guess), trying to inspire them in a certain direction as well as entertain. I got a very strong Lemonade Mouth-feel from this (the movie, not the book—I never got around to reading that), I realize that’s a reference that only works for readers/parents of a certain age, but I don’t know anything more contemporary.

It’s a celebration of freedom, of literature, of learning from your mistakes and sticking up for what you believe (even if you do it poorly at first). It’s about finding the courage to do the right thing, even when not expedient.

I’m guessing it was the apparent upsurge in School Book Bans that led my library to getting this audiobook, and I’m glad they did. It’s something that people should be reading about/thinking about/talking about. Hopefully, this book kicks off some of that in our area.

I really enjoyed this and figure most book lovers will, too.


3.5 Stars

This post contains an affiliate link. If you purchase from it, I will get a small commission at no additional cost to you. As always, opinions are my own.

Revenge of the Beast by Jack Meggitt-Phillips, Isabelle Follath (Illustrator): A Tale of Vengeance and Do-Goodery

Revenge of the Beast Tour Banner

Revenge of the BeastRevenge of the Beast

by Jack Meggitt Phillips, Isabelle Follath (Illustrator)

DETAILS:
Series: The Beast and the Bethany, #2
Publisher: Aladdin (US); Farshore (UK)
Publication Date: March 22, 2022 (US); September 30, 2021 (UK)
Format: eARC
Length: 272 pg.
Read Date: February 1-2, 2022
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What’s Revenge of the Beast About?

At the end of The Beast and The Bethany, Bethany, Ebenezer, and Claudette (the Wintlorian purple-breasted parrot) were sure that The Beast was vanquished and they could start living their lives in a new direction.

They’re de-Beasting their lives—getting rid of just about everything that The Beast magicked into existence for Ebenezer over the centuries—and they’re devoting their energies to do-gooding. Bethany needs to make up to people for all her pranks, and Ebenezer has a lot of karmic debt to pay off (and Bethany’s pushing him). He also is doing what he can to stay off the radar of the organization that’s been chasing the Beast for more centuries than Ebenezer’s been alive. That’ll be easier to do without magic items laying around.

But as the title of this book suggests, they were wrong. The Beast isn’t done yet, and he’s out to get back at those three—and anyone else who happens to be in the general vicinity while he’s at it.

Their do-gooding efforts stumble, the items they tried to divest themselves of start to behave strangely—and dangerously—for their new owners. No matter what they attempt to do, something goes wrong. It’s time for some drastic measures.

Comparatively Speaking, are We Sure The Beast is the Worst?

There are a handful of new characters introduced in this book, which helps in a few ways—it shows how much Bethany has changed Ebenezer’s life by expanding his social world, and it adds a little flavor to the series. But there are three new characters* in particular I want to single out: The Cussocks. Mr. and Mrs. Cussock run the theater that plays a significant role in the novel and their daughter, Gloria. Gloria reminds me of the TV version of Nellie Oleson, without the redeeming characteristics. Nellie knew how she should act and just didn’t care. I don’t think Gloria knows how she should act, she’s pure id. Once you get to know her parents, a bit, you start to see why. I’m not going to get into it, but just know that Gloria lives in the same orphanage that Bethany used to live in, because they just can’t stand her (and have no problem letting everyone—including her—know that).

* I’m pretty sure they’re new, they may have played minor roles in the first book. But I don’t think so, and I’m too lazy to check..

It’d be easy in a book like this to make The Beast the epitome of all evil, and every human and animal nothing more than a potential victim. Bethany and Ebenezer have some restitution to do and need to reform, but they’re trying. But as long as people like the Cussocks are around, the reader has to remember that people are capable of the same kind of evil as The Beast is. They don’t have magic to help, and they don’t get their sustenance from eating humans—which almost makes it worse, you could make a pragmatic argument for a lot of what The Beast does. But the Cussocks don’t have that going for them.

(but to be clear, all four of them are truly reprehensible characters)

True Horror: The Food

Sure, there’s a magic being eating people, producing magical items, and inflicting all sorts of psychological damage; a possibly sociopathic little girl inflicting pain on her peers; and a centuries-old man wandering around in this book. But the true horror? The food designed by Bethany and others.

Bethany considers herself a sandwich artist. No, she’d probably be inclined to add the “e,” she’s a sandwich artiste. Some of the flavor combinations she comes up with would make me run start swallowing Bertie Bott’s Every Flavour Beans by the handful without wondering/caring what flavors they’d be. They’re fully at the intersection of incredibly imaginative and incredibly unappealing.

It’s the kind of humor that an MG reader is practically guaranteed to enjoy.

Illustrations

I’m pretty sure neither of these books would be as successful without the contributions of Isabelle Follath. Her illustrations—sort of a mash-up of Eugene Yelchin, Quentin Blake, and Jules Feiffer—are attractive, eye-catching, and augment the text without being a distraction. I made more notes than usual about liking the artwork in this novel. Rather than further demonstrate how poorly I describe art, I’ll just say that her stuff is great and leave it at that.

So, what did I think about Revenge of the Beast?

I know when I posted about The Beast and The Bethany, I was aware that it was the first of a series, but I have to tell you, I thought it made a great stand-alone book. So much so that I forgot there were more books to come, I got this one primarily out of curiosity about how Meggitt-Phillips would approach this, rather than a curiosity about the characters or story. I was satisfied with where the first book left things.

That said, if you’re going to write an unnecessary sequel, this is the way you want to do it. Give some good backstory about the antagonist and one of the protagonists, and help the reader understand how they got started five centuries ago. Then while you’re doing that, show how everything you thought happened at the end of the first book wasn’t at all what was going on—so we need to read the sequel. It was really well-conceived in that way. But given the two that exist, we definitely need a third (which is, thankfully, on the way)

I think it’s best if I think of this in two different ways, it’s a creative way to tell this story, the morals are there for those who want to see them (again), but are easily ignored if that’s what the reader prefers. The humor is a bit subtler this time out, but it’s just as funny if you’re looking for it. I was honestly surprised by a couple of plot developments, too. But…it just didn’t work as well for me as its predecessor. Like I said with And Your Enemies Closer, a lot of that is likely just the way second novels in a trilogy strike me. But I don’t think it’s all of the reason why. I think it’s probably a function of separating (for good and understandable reasons of plot) Ebenezer and Bethany for so much of the book. The series is stronger when they’re together.

On the other hand, if I got this book when I was in Fifth Grade? I’d really dig it, and it would earn a spot in my Roald Dahl-Daniel M. Pinkwater-Norton Juster re-read cycle, right alongside The Beast and The Bethany, and I’d get it read at least four more times before the third volume is released. Since that guy is the one that Meggitt-Phillips is writing for, not the guy with four adult children—I figure that’s good enough.

At least three of my four kids would’ve loved this when they were the right age (and it’s possible that the fourth one would’ve, too)—and I’m willing to bet that whatever parents are reading this would find similar results in their homes. They should pick this up and see.


3.5 Stars

This post contains an affiliate link. If you purchase from it, I will get a small commission at no additional cost to you. As always, opinions are my own.

My thanks to The Write Reads for the invitation to participate in this tour and the materials they provided, via Netgalley and Farshore.

Dogtripping by David Rosenfelt: Moving a Very Unusual, Very Large, Very Hairy Family Across the U.S.

DogtrippingDogtripping:
25 Rescues, 11 Volunteers,
and 3 RVs on Our Canine
Cross-Country Adventure

by David Rosenfelt

DETAILS:
Publisher: St. Martin's Press
Publication Date: July 23, 2013
Format: Hardcover
Length: 278 pg.
Read Date: January 19-20, 2022
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The overriding view of everyone was that it was going to be a great adventure, successful and a hell of a lot of fun.

Except for me.

I was expecting a disaster.

What’s Dogtripping About?

After a decade and a half or so of running their dog rescue in southern California, David Rosenfelt and his wife decide to move out of California (a very close call with a wildfire is a primary impetus for this) to Maine. But they have a bigger logistical challenge than most of us do when we make a move—either cross-town or cross-country. Sure, it can be hard to figure out the best way to move a piano or a fragile heirloom—but ultimately, that’s something that people do all the time. But how do you get twenty-five dogs cross-country?

First of all, you need help—and we’re not talking the kind of help where you get a few friends together, promise a pizza and a six-pack to split, and get them to help you move a piano or a sofa. This is a bigger project. You also have to figure out what kind of vehicle—or vehicles—will be needed, where you all will sleep, how can you deal with the bathroom breaks, and so on.

Right there, that’s an interesting story, many people—especially dog lovers would read that. When the talented and amusing author of the Andy Carpenter novels tells the story, it becomes an entertaining read.

Interspersed between chapters discussing the preparation for the trip and the trip itself are chapters describing the background for The Tara Foundation (starting with the dog it’s named after), the development and growth of their rescue efforts, and profiles of some of the dogs.

Dog Profiles

My favorite parts of the book are the 2-3 page profiles of some of the dogs that have stayed with their pack—for anywhere from a week to several years. He starts by describing how the dog came to their attention, then he talks about the specific challenges for that dog, their personality, and how they integrated into the menagerie. Then he’ll describe how they took to the move—if they were part of that 25—found a family to adopt them, or how their life came to an end.

Obviously, I preferred reading the first two endings—but they’ve been at this for a long time, and most of their rescues are senior dogs, it’s a reality they have to deal with far too often. Not always, but I generally got a little misty for those other endings. Rosenfelt has a real knack for making you grin/chuckle, telling a heartwarming story, and then hitting you with the sadness that comes from the brevity of canine life.

Still, I’d read an entry on every dog they ever had in their shelter and come back for more.

Incidentally, he includes some really sound advice on deciding when to put an ailing dog to sleep.*

* Please, no one tell my almost 16-year old Pug/Beagle mix that I read anything about that. No need to stress her out.

Too Many Italics

I am not a fan of extended sections of italics—there are better ways to set aside chunks of text (going to a sans serif typeface, for example), but I’m mostly used to them. A character’s thoughts—usually a sentence or two–I can handle. I can even put up with a few paragraphs for a dream sequence or flashback or something. But whole chapters really bug me.

And that’s what we get here—and not just a few, but several. There’s no set pattern, but typically a couple of chapters in regular type (one of them being really brief) and then one in italics. It’s very aggravating.

But here’s the worst part—it’s the chapters that are about the subject of the book that are italicized! The background chapters, the chapters that profile individual dogs, or are just full of Rosenfelt talking about some topic (for example: their efforts to keep the smell of all their dogs using the back yard as a bathroom from bothering the neighbors) are all in regular type. But the part of the book that the title and subtitle describe are italicized.

I don’t understand that choice. I certainly didn’t enjoy it.

So, what did I think about Dogtripping?

Twenty-five is pretty much the fewest dogs Debbie and I have had in the last ten years. We’ve had as many as forty-two, but we feel that more than forty is slightly eccentric.

This was a fast, fun read—with some really touching moments mixed in.

I’m going to borrow the conclusion to my post about Rosenfelt’s other book about their rescues, Lessons from Tara, because it works just as well here, and I’m tired:

Fans of the Andy Carpenter series will be happy to hear that Andy’s voice is Rosenfelt’s—the book at times feels like an Andy Carpenter book without all the muss and fuss of a plot, murder, or trial. I laughed, I chuckled, I learned a thing or two, and I even got misty more than I wanted to. All in all a really strong read. If you’re a dog lover, or just someone who likes to read good things, find some time for this one.


3.5 Stars

This post contains an affiliate link. If you purchase from it, I will get a small commission at no additional cost to you. As always, opinions are my own.

Where the Drowned Girls Go by Seanan McGuire: A Mermaid Saves Herself

Where the Drowned Girls GoWhere the Drowned Girls Go

by Seanan McGuire

DETAILS:
Series: Wayward Children, #7
Publisher: Tor 
Publication Year: 2022
Format: Hardcover
Length: 150
Read Date: January 10-11, 2022
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And everyone knew that things from the other side of the door could absolutely leak through into this reality. Her hair had been brown, not aquamarine, before she found her fins. Christopher would die without his flute—literally die. Seraphina was the kind of beautiful that stopped hearts, and everyone who’d seen pictures of her from before her travels said that she hadn’t always been like that. She’d been attractive, not impossible. The doors made changes. The doors stayed with you.

What’s Where the Drowned Girls Go About?

Things have gone poorly for Cora since her return from the Moors, and things are getting worse for her. She’s now afraid of getting a door—because it might not lead to the world she wants. So now that “other school” starts to sound appealing to her. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad to feel at home in this world—it’s certainly better than one of the alternatives. There’s no way that she’ll get those tools at this school (as much as she likes/loves her friends).

So she talks West into transferring her—and regrets the decision before the ink is dried. Still, she sets out to make the best of a bad situation—it’s still going to get her the results she’s been desiring, just not in a pleasant way.

Cora tackles the situation in a “no pain, no gain” manner. West’s school wasn’t helping (at least not the way she wanted), the Whitethorn Institute isn’t going to save her, it’s up to Cora to save herself.

Whitethorn Institute

“You’ve always said that there was a second school.”

Eleanor pulled her hands away. “The Whitethorn Institute. Cora, you can’t intend—”

“You said they steal your students sometimes. That when you’re not fast enough, or when the children are having a harder time adapting to life in this reality, that sometimes Whitethorn gets there first.” She sat up straight, giving Eleanor a challenging look. “You said it was where students go when they want to believe that everything that happened on the other side of the door was just a dream, or a delusion, and not a real thing at all.”

We’ve known about “the other school” for children who come back through their doors into our world—one for those who didn’t want to see their doors again, one for those who want to feel at home in this world. But this is the first time we’ve seen it.

It is not a nice place to be.

That’s about all I feel comfortable about saying—you’ll need to read the book to see how it’s not a nice place to be. I get that (especially as the series takes a pro-Eleanor West’s Home for Wayward Children stance) it’s not going to seem as nice, welcoming, and affirming as the school we’re used to. I expected that this school would come across as wanting, not just in contrast, but objectively,

But I think McGuire approached that idea in a lazy manner. It’s too obviously a bad environment. She had the chance to go subtle, and she didn’t take it. I kept thinking, “Oh, she’s making a commentary about X or Y” in the real world—but she was doing so with too broad a brush, and it’d end up applying to things she didn’t mean to attack.

Still, if you’re looking to make an establishment a villain, she did an effective job. I think it’d have been more interesting—and more fitting with the series—if there’d been more nuance to it. Give the readers a second school that has differing goals from the Home for Wayward Children, but let us respect them while disagreeing—then you’ve got something. Instead, we get an institution that might as well be twirling its mustache.

Regan

It’s not just Cora that we see here, Regan’s also came to this school after returning from the Hooflands. I appreciated that. I didn’t think we had enough of Regan—but it didn’t feel like the character would be showing up at West’s.

So, what did I think about Where the Drowned Girls Go?

McGuire is simply one of the best around—and this world she’s created in this series is just wonderful and I really enjoy all the time I spend in it. But this book seemed to be missing something. The previous books in the series all left the possibility open to revisiting the world on the other side of the door, the POV character, and so on—while telling a complete story.

This novel is also a complete story—but it feels (at least to me) too much like a Part One of at least a two-parter (if not three). And I think the book suffered from it. When we get to that second part, I might change my mind about this book, but now it just feels incomplete. Add in my problems with the presentation of Whitethorn and it makes for a less-satisfying read than I’m used to for this series.

I still recommend it as a read—you’re instantly sucked into this world, it’s fantastic to get a look at Whitethorn (if nothing else); the story of Cora, Regan, and the others is well-worth telling and reading; and McGuire’s language and imagination in this series are always fascinating. I just wanted more of this good thing.


3.5 Stars

This post contains an affiliate link. If you purchase from it, I will get a small commission at no additional cost to you. As always, opinions are my own.

Bloodlines by Peter Hartog: Angels and Vampires. Vampires and Drug Lords. Or Something Like That.

BloodlinesBloodlines

by Peter Hartog

BOOK DETAILS:
Series: The Guardian of Empire City, Book One
Publication Year: 2019
Format: Kindle Eition
Length: 446 pages
Read Date: January 4-10, 2022

“Aren’t you supposed to be governed by logic and all that?”

“Even your most famous literary detective said, ‘once you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth,’” she said.

“Sherlock Holmes wouldn’t have believed in vampires, either,” I countered.

“Well, we do live in interesting times, Holliday,” Deacon quipped.

What’s Bloodlines About?

Er, actually…this is the wrong place to start. Let’s try this instead:

Describe this World

This takes place in a futuristic world where human population/civilizations have been destroyed through a combination of “terrorist cyber-attacks, a bunch of nuclear catastrophes, and the pandemics that followed.” Nations have been replaced by a number of enclaves throughout the world, like Empire City (that grew from the ruins of New York), the Confederate States of Birmingham (a theocratic state), and the People’s Republic of Boulder.

Long story short: one of the side effects of the nuclear catastrophes was a new form of energy in the world that acted close enough to magic that people called it that. Also, it made it possible for beings from another dimension to travel to Earth. They’re called Vellans, and I’m going to leave it to Hartog to describe them to you when you read the book (a thing I think you should do).

So, as our setting we’ve got that rebuilt NYC, patching a society and culture together, in a world that looks not dissimilar from Scott’s Blade Runner, powered by magic, and that has pan-dimensional aliens walking around. Clear enough?

Now, with that out of the way, we can ask:

What’s Bloodlines About?

“They aren’t equipped to deal with the things that I want Special Crimes to handle.”

“Such as what, exactly?” I asked.

“Things that require more than a badge, a pair of handcuffs and a warrant,” Mahoney replied, fierce heat coating his words. “Things that laugh at the law, thinking they are above, or beyond it. Things that don’t give a damn about you or me.”

Our protagonist/narrator is Detective Tom “Doc” Holliday, his career has taken a hit and while he still gets to investigate the occasional homicide, he’s primarily the guy who does paperwork for everyone else. He’s recruited to be part of the Special Crimes Unit, working on “the unsolvable and inexplicable” (think Dresden Files‘ Special Investigations or Rivers of London The Folly). At this point, the unit consists of a retired legend of ECPD leading a former Protector (a law enforcement officer from Birmingham) and another consultant. But once they make their mark on the city, there’s a suggestion that they’ll get more legitimacy and funding. Holliday doesn’t much care, it’s a chance to do more than paperwork.

Their first case involves a murder that a tabloid is claiming a vampire committed (farfetched, sure, but it’s a solid explanation for the eyewitness testimony and the physical evidence—at first glance, anyway). Still, a vampire is far-fetched even for this new magical reality. Holliday doesn’t buy it, he’s looking for a more rational explanation. But this is the kind of thing that SCU is for so Holliday and the tiny team dive in.

Doc Holliday

I live and work in the real world. I go after criminals, arrest them, then do it again, and hope I don’t get killed in the process. I do it because it’s my job, I’ve got the training and it’s the right f****** thing to do.”

If you can enjoy—to some extent—Holliday, you’re going to enjoy the novel. I can see where some won’t get along with him, and they’ll have a miserable time with this book. Me? I’m not going to declare us BFFs after just one book, but I’d be more than happy to have a few cups of coffee with the man.

In addition to being the driven detective (at one time, he was considered one of the top three homicide detectives in the enclave), he has a Ph.D. in Literature and a Master’s in gourmet cooking. That’s a tried and true combination of interests, sure to resonate with fans of Detective Fiction. His troubled past, self-destructive tendencies, and wiseguy mouth/attitude add to that appeal.

Along those lines, I appreciate the way Holliday leans on his literary background to get him through tough moments, quoting Shakespeare or other notables to talk steel himself—or calm himself—in a tight situation is nice to see.

As for his clairvoyance? It’s interesting to see in action, and hopefully, as he learns to master and develop the ability, I’ll enjoy it more. It’s a good start at a character with magic, but he needs a little work.

A Question of Genre

As I’ve established before, once I decide to read a book, I pretty much forget everything I learned about it. I remembered that this was an Urban Fantasy—which made me a little leary, and also insanely curious. It’s been a while since I read a new-to-me Urban Fantasy, because most of the new ones I dabbled in didn’t work for me. At the same time, I really want a new-to-me Urban Fantasy series…

I wasn’t prepared for this “blend of science fiction, urban fantasy and crime thriller” (as the author describes it at the end of the book). I’d read one book like that years ago—and it was…okay? In many ways, this is that book, but better. Significantly better.

This reads more like a Futuristic Police Detective novel with Urban Fantasy flourishes. Most of the time. The rest of the time, it’s an Urban Fantasy with neat technology.

The magic system is pretty vague at this point in the series—one of the advantages of “magic” being a new thing to this world, so no one understands it that well, and an author can make it do whatever he wants. Each instance of magic at work is just cool. It reminded me of why I got into Urban Fantasy in the first place, actually, any kind of Fantasy with magic users.

So, what did I think about Bloodlines?

This really impressed me—I was distracted with a non-reading project most of the time that I was reading this book, so I couldn’t devote the time I wanted to devote to it, only reading thirty minutes or so a day. It’s the kind of thing I could’ve been very happy to read in a session or to (and I might have enjoyed it more if I could’ve taken the plunge).

I’m a little tired of authors mining a vague, pop-understanding of Roman Catholicism for their Magical/Fantasy purposes. But I guess it’s easier to do that than to try to find aspects of Protestantism to serve that purpose (the presence of someone with roots in a vaguely Southern Evangelical culture suggests that Hartog intends to try). I’m not going to hold it against this book, I’m just taking the opportunity to belly-ache. Because, if you’re doing to co-opt bits of Roman Catholic practice, this is a pretty tame way to go about it.

I’m definitely coming back for more—I want to explore this world some more, I want more time with the members of the Special Crimes Unit, and I’m curious about the overarching story introduced in the latter parts of this book. I’m not there yet, but I can see me becoming a pretty big fan-boy for this series.

I think anyone who thinks an Urban Fantasy/Science Fiction/Detective mashup novel might be interesting will find themselves entertained with this one-stop source to get your genre-itch scratched. Give it a try, let me know what you think.

A Dream About Lightning Bugs by Ben Folds: Pianos, Pop Music, and a Life in Progress

A Dream About Lightning Bugs

A Dream About
Lightning Bugs:
A Life of Music
and Cheap Lessons

by Ben Folds

Trade Paperback, 311 pg.
Ballantine Books, 2019

Read: December 17-27, 2021
Grab a copy from your local indie bookstore!

So what about the middle-aged making pop music? Sure, it’s allowed. But let’s be honest about what pop, or popular, music is. It’s music for the mating age. It’s a soundtrack for that yearning, that youthful anger, those ideals and inside jokes of the teenagers and young adults as they experience the rough ride together. It fills an an important need. It help us get through to adulthood. Pop music can be a life jacket, a sexy security blanket, a hipster Hallmark card. And it communicates very real things. It also requires serious craft and is a competitive business, worthy of great respect. Pop music saved my ass as a kid, paid the bills in my earlier career. And I love to make fun of it.

What’s A Dream About Lightning Bugs About?

Well, it’s a memoir by Ben Folds, covering childhood through the present (give or take a few years). He talks about the teachers that helped him along the way, his struggles in various schools, his early music career (including being a one-man polka band), how horrible he is at marriage, the formation of Ben Folds Five, the dissolution of it, his solo career, parenting and how (and why) his career is shifting, his thoughts on writing, music, comedy and all sorts of other things.

Basically, a little about everything.

Highlights

I don’t have time—and you don’t have the attention span—to write about all the things that are worth saying about this book. So, here’s a quick list of some of the highlights of the book:
bullet He has a section about humor records that he listened to as a kid, and muses on comedy in general. It was the first time in the book that things really clicked for me.
bullet There’s a section about life in the suburbs, the angry music associated with it in the 90s (and beyond) and I thought was really insightful.
bullet The story about the release day for his album Rockin’ the Suburbs and being live on the radio to promote it when the attacks for 9/11 happened. That chapter was just great.
bullet It’s hard to beat a section on writer’s block by someone who’s worked through it.
bullet I’m a big fan of the (little known) band Fleming and John—him talking about them for a paragraph or two made me really happy. Also, the part of the book about William Shatner? There’s nothing like a good Shatner story.
bullet Folds has done some truly horrible things on tour—throwing piano stools on a regular basis with the band (and breaking other things with those stools), lying like crazy about his personal life on tour with John Mayer and the fallout from it. It ain’t pretty, but it’s good to see him talking about it.

The Spotify Playlist

Random House has a Spotify playlist for the book, which is just a great idea. It’s a great soundtrack for the book or just fun to listen to on its own. There are many songs by Folds that he talks about or makes a passing reference to in the book. There are also many songs that he didn’t write/record but that he talks about. If you like Folds/the music that inspired him—you’re going to dig this.

So, what did I think about A Dream About Lightning Bugs?

I enjoyed getting to know Folds a bit better—warts and all. It took a long time for me to really get into it, though. Yes, the parts about his early life were interesting—and I enjoyed it, but it was really easy to put the book down.

But once we got to Ben Folds Five? I was hooked and I flew through the rest of the book. Maybe it’s because I was getting background information on the band and music I knew so well. But I think it’s because Folds shows a different kind of passion for things once his career started to take off and that passion translated into being more interesting reading. It’s likely a little of both and a few other things, too.

Some of the book that’s less about him and his career and more about his thoughts about creating, performing, music, etc.—that’s inspirational, motivational—and the kind of thing I’ll come back to re-read from time to time.

This probably isn’t a book for people who aren’t at least a casual fan of Folds as a solo artist or his band. But for those who are? It’s a lot of fun, and worth the time.


3.5 Stars

This post contains an affiliate link. If you purchase from it, I will get a small commission at no additional cost to you. As always, opinions are my own.

Bodacious Creed and the Jade Lake by Jonathan Fesmire: Steampunk’s Answer to Alex Murphy is Back in Action

Bodacious Creed and the Jade Lake

Bodacious Creed and the Jade Lake

by Jonathan Fesmire
Series: The Adventures of Bodacious Creed, #2

Paperback, 193 pg.
2021

Read: October 20-22, 2021

What’s Bodacious Creed and the Jade Lake About?

Years ago, Bodacious Creed, was one of the most feared/respected/famous lawmen in nineteenth-century California—then he was killed, and somehow brought back to something like life due to some amazing technology, to become a super-powered force for good.

After his “resurrection” (for lack of a better term), he’s started repairing his relationship with his daughter and has taken on a new level of folk-hero status as he seeks to take down the criminal empire that controls too much of California—and was responsible for his near-death.

One night he rushes to the rescue of an escaped Chinese slave—but is too late, and as she dies in his arms, she gives him enough information to track down where she escaped from so he can find some justice for her. Implanted in her are mechanical parts not too dissimilar from those he’s been augmented with. The idea that women are having this done to them unwillingly (and for an unknown reason), is too much—so Creed sets his sights on bringing this done.

Creed sets out for San Francisco, finds new allies for his quest (think Team Arrow/Team Flash)—they’re a strange batch of scientists, thinkers, and community activists looking for ways to make a difference. THey’re also begging to have a series made centering on them. Between their resources and Creed’s dogged determinism, they’re sure to get to the bottom of things.

San Francisco of the time isn’t the nicest place—which is pretty much how it’s always fictionally depicted, I guess. It’s not quite Mos Eisley, but the odds of finding even a mostly honest lawman aren’t that great—so, Creed and his friends are largely on their own.

So, what did I think about Bodacious Creed and the Jade Lake?

Like its predecessor, Jade Lake, is simply an entertaining read—just look at all the elements: Western, Steampunk, and Zombies*. Take three beloved and entertaining genres and put them together—sure, so many things could go wrong—but it’s hard to imagine how that’s not a crowd-pleaser.

* Okay, I know I’m not a huge Zombie fan—but almost everyone else is.

And it is, Fesmire tells a good adventure story. I don’t know what else to say about this, and I’ve tried. The Bodacious Creed series delivers what it promises: steam-powered action and adventure. With an enhanced coyote sidekick! How do you pass that up?

Disclaimer: I participated in crowdfunding efforts for this book, which might make me seem like I’m in the tank for this, but I just think of it as a very pre- kind of pre-order.


3.5 Stars

Some Things I Still Can’t Tell You by Misha Collins: A Thoroughly Pleasant Batch of Poems

Some Things I Still Can’t Tell You

Some Things I Still Can’t Tell You

by Misha Collins

Paperback, 129 pg.
Andrews McNeel Publishing, 2021

Grab a copy from your local indie bookstore!

A Quick Disclaimer

I really need to come up with a boiler-plate paragraph, or at least a sentence or two for the rare occasions when I read a book of poems: Poetry isn’t my thing. I try it every now and then (mostly then), and usually, when I do so, I’m reminded that it’s not something I can easily appreciate.

Still, this is my second collection this year. Maybe I’m turning a corner.*

* Probably** not.

**Almost certainly not.

So, Why Did I Buy & Read Some Things I Still Can’t Tell You

That’s easy—my daughter is one of Collins’ biggest fans and I knew she’d be raving about it. I thought it’d be nice to have something to talk about.

What’s Some Things I Still Can’t Tell You About?

This is a collection of brief (all under two small pages—most less than one) poems by the actor Misha Collins—some are about his wife and their relationship, some about his parents, friends, children, and so on.

A Common Structure

You know how with Sudden Fiction there’s a line or two at the end that acts like a punchline? Not necessarily like with a joke, but something that adds a little twist, or a surprise at the end of the story. These poems almost always feature something like that—you’re going along reading about a rainy day or something, and then in a line or two it turns into something about missing his wife. Or being a jerk about something. Or thinking about a dead friend. Something to give a little “punch.”

It was common, but even after a couple dozen of them, it didn’t stop being effective. And the ones that didn’t have it weren’t quite as good.

So, what did I think about Some Things I Still Can’t Tell You?

I don’t know if they’re great art—my instinct is to say no, but what do I know? I do know that they’re effective. They capture the feeling, the moment, the whatever Collins is talking about—they’re not the kind of poems you have to sit and ponder to dig out the meaning (you probably can dig deeper than I did), you get the payoff immediately.

For me, that’s what I want in a poem—a thought (fleeting or otherwise), an impression, a feeling—captured and passed on.

Going by that definition, this collection is a success.


3.5 Stars

This post contains an affiliate link. If you purchase from it, I will get a small commission at no additional cost to you. As always, opinions are my own.

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