Category: Calendar Items

Dusted Off: Happy Birthday, Archie!

On Oct 23 in Chillicothe, Ohio, Archie Goodwin entered this world–no doubt with a smile for the pretty nurses–and American detective literature was never the same.

I’m toasting him in one of the ways I think he’d appreciate most–by raising a glass of milk in his honor.

Who was Archie? Archie summed up his life thusly:

Born in Ohio. Public high school, pretty good at geometry and football, graduated with honor but no honors. Went to college two weeks, decided it was childish, came to New York and got a job guarding a pier, shot and killed two men and was fired, was recommended to Nero Wolfe for a chore he wanted done, did it, was offered a full-time job by Mr. Wolfe, took it, still have it.” (Fourth of July Picinic)

Long may he keep it. Just what was he employed by Wolfe to do? In The Black Mountain he answers the statement, “I thought you was a private eye” with:

I don’t like the way you say it, but I am. Also I am an accountant, an amanuensis, and a cocklebur. Eight to five you never heard the word amanuensis and you never saw a cocklebur.

In The Red Box, he says

I know pretty well what my field is. Aside from my primary function as the thorn in the seat of Wolfe’s chair to keep him from going to sleep and waking up only for meals, I’m chiefly cut out for two things: to jump and grab something before the other guy can get his paws on it, and to collect pieces of the puzzle for Wolfe to work on.

In case you’re wondering if this post was simply an excuse to go through some collections of Archie Goodwin quotations, you wouldn’t be totally wrong…he’s one of the fictional characters I like spending time with most in this world–he’s the literary equivalent of comfort food. So just one more great line I’ve quoted here before:

I would appreciate it if they would call a halt on all their devoted efforts to find a way to abolish war or eliminate disease or run trains with atoms or extend the span of human life to a couple of centuries, and everybody concentrate for a while on how to wake me up in the morning without my resenting it. It may be that a bevy of beautiful maidens in pure silk yellow very sheer gowns, barefooted, singing “Oh, What a Beautiful Morning” and scattering rose petals over me would do the trick, but I’d have to try it.

Dusted Off: Towel Day 2008 (observed)

We observed Towel Day on Monday, once again celebrating the author who permanently skewed my mind back in Junior High. Couldn’t get things organized enough for a group shot this year, but I was able to snag some individual shots:

oh, yeah, and a little gift from The Love of my Life…

(will try to get a better shot of that soon)

Dusted Off: My Favorite Wise-Cracking PI

On Oct 23 in Chillicothe, Ohio, Archie Goodwin entered this world–no doubt with a smile for the pretty nurses–and the face of American literature was destined to change.

I’m raising a glass of milk in his honor.

Somewhere I have a long list of wonderful things that Archie has said, but (and I’ve quoted this before here) this is the only one at my fingertips. Am sure one or two of you could add some in the comments section. But I think this tells enough about the gumshoe that one can understand why he’s my favorite, and maybe even want to read some of him themselves.

I would appreciate it if they would call a halt on all their devoted efforts to find a way to abolish war or eliminate disease or run trains with atoms or extend the span of human life to a couple of centuries, and everybody concentrate for a while on how to wake me up in the morning without my resenting it. It may be that a bevy of beautiful maidens in pure silk yellow very sheer gowns, barefooted, singing Oh, What a Beautiful Morning and scattering rose petals over me would do the trick, but I’d have to try it. — Archie Goodwin

Dusted Off: Happy April 15th

“A man condemning the income tax because of the annoyance it gives him or the expense it puts him to is merely a dog baring its teeth, and he forfeits the privileges of civilized discourse. But it is permissible to criticize it on other and impersonal grounds. A government, like an individual, spends money for any or all of three reasons: because it needs to, because it wants to, or simply because it has it to spend. The last is much the shabbiest. It is arguable, if not manifest, that a substantial proportion of this great spring flood of billions pouring into the Treasury will in effect get spent for that last shabby reason.”

–Nero Wolfe

Dusted Off: Banned Book Week

Ooh, it’s Banned Books Week–that time of the year when librarians can change their posters and make people think of all sorts of scary things that can happen if a book it stomped out. Now, to an extent, I see the point, and can share the concern. But frankly, I bet it’s publicity like this that helps keep people banning certain books.

Well, the Crusty Curmudgeon posted a list of Banned Books, and like him, I’m a sucker for these lists. So here’s the list with the ones I read in bold. I count 18, which means I’m just a little bit naughtier than Scott.

  • Scary Stories (Series) by Alvin Schwartz
  • Daddy’s Roommate by Michael Willhoite
  • I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings by Maya Angelou–I think I started this one, but can’t say it for sure.
  • The Chocolate War by Robert Cormier–read this and a sequel or two as I recall…creepy, intense, but I loved it.
  • The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain–this one goes down as a “YOU MISSED THE FRIGGIN’ POINT OF THE BOOK IF YOU BANNED IT!!!” I love this book, and it grieves me no end that people trash it…
  • Of Mice and Men by John Steinbeck–it was a nice book. Like it better than The Grapes of Wrath
  • Harry Potter (Series) by J.K. Rowling–yup, read ’em all at least twice (well, haven’t read the Order of the Phoenix twice yet…hmmm, know what I’m doing on semester break…)
  • Forever by Judy Blume
  • Bridge to Terabithia by Katherine Paterson. Read it several times, don’t remember a think about it
  • Alice (Series) by Phyllis Reynolds Naylor
  • Heather Has Two Mommies by Leslea Newman–should probably read it just so I know what the fuss is all about
  • My Brother Sam is Dead by James Lincoln Collier and Christopher Collier
  • The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger–should probably read it just so I know what the fuss is all about
  • The Giver by Lois Lowry
  • It’s Perfectly Normal by Robie Harris
  • Goosebumps (Series) by R.L. Stine–looked dumb then, looks dumber now
  • A Day No Pigs Would Die by Robert Newton Peck
  • The Color Purple by Alice Walker
  • Sex by Madonna–oh my, can’t believe I’m admitting in public that I read this. What can I say? I was in college, curious, and my roommate had too much money. So he bought it, brought it back to the dorm and we read it…and got really bored (when we weren’t freaked out)
  • Earth’s Children (Series) by Jean M. Auel
  • The Great Gilly Hopkins by Katherine Paterson
  • A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L’Engle–read this and the sequels several times…don’t see why this would be banned (unless people don’t like Gnostics, which hey, I can relate to…)
  • Go Ask Alice by Anonymous
  • Fallen Angels by Walter Dean Myers
  • In the Night Kitchen by Maurice Sendak
  • The Stupids (Series) by Harry Allard
  • The Witches by Roald Dahl–not my favorite Dahl, but as I recall it was okay
  • The New Joy of Gay Sex by Charles Silverstein
  • Anastasia Krupnik (Series) by Lois Lowry
  • The Goats by Brock Cole
  • Kaffir Boy by Mark Mathabane
  • Blubber by Judy Blume–I think it was this book that made me decide that only the books about boys by Blume should be read by boys.
  • Killing Mr. Griffin by Lois Duncan
  • Halloween ABC by Eve Merriam
  • We All Fall Down by Robert Cormier
  • Final Exit by Derek Humphry
  • The Handmaid’s Tale by Margaret Atwood
  • Julie of the Wolves by Jean Craighead George
  • The Bluest Eye by Toni Morrison
  • What’s Happening to my Body? Book for Girls: A Growing-Up Guide for Parents & Daughters by Lynda Madaras
  • To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee–this falls into the same category as Huck Finn. YOU HAVE TO READ A BOOK BEFORE YOU BAN IT, IDIOTS!
  • Beloved by Toni Morrison
  • The Outsiders by S.E. Hinton–um, whatever. Didn’t really see the point of all the excitement about this one
  • The Pigman by Paul Zindel
  • Bumps in the Night by Harry Allard
  • Deenie by Judy Blume
  • Flowers for Algernon by Daniel Keyes
  • Annie on my Mind by Nancy Garden
  • The Boy Who Lost His Face by Louis Sachar
  • Cross Your Fingers, Spit in Your Hat by Alvin Schwartz

  • A Light in the Attic by Shel Silverstein
  • Brave New World by Aldous Huxley–been on my “to read” list for about 15 years
  • Sleeping Beauty Trilogy by A.N. Roquelaure (Anne Rice)
  • Asking About Sex and Growing Up by Joanna Cole
  • Cujo by Stephen King
  • James and the Giant Peach by Roald Dahl–wha? how is this on a banned book list? Did I miss something?
  • The Anarchist Cookbook by William Powell–don’t own it, never made anything from it, never felt the slightest bit of interest in doing so
  • Boys and Sex by Wardell Pomeroy
  • Ordinary People by Judith Guest
  • American Psycho by Bret Easton Ellis
  • What’s Happening to my Body? Book for Boys: A Growing-Up Guide for Parents & Sons by Lynda Madaras
  • Are You There, God? It’s Me, Margaret by Judy Blume–tried it, remembered the lesson learned from Blubber and stopped
  • Crazy Lady by Jane Conly
  • Athletic Shorts by Chris Crutcher
  • Fade by Robert Cormier
  • Guess What? by Mem Fox
  • The House of Spirits by Isabel Allende
  • The Face on the Milk Carton by Caroline Cooney
  • Slaughterhouse-Five by Kurt Vonnegut
  • Lord of the Flies by William Golding–best literary example of Total Depravity, but hated the book
  • Native Son by Richard Wright
  • Women on Top: How Real Life Has Changed Women’s Fantasies by Nancy Friday
  • Curses, Hexes and Spells by Daniel Cohen
  • Jack by A.M. Homes
  • Bless Me, Ultima by Rudolfo A. Anaya. Absolutely don’t see why this would be banned. Called over-rated? Sure. But it was a nice little story.
  • Where Did I Come From? by Peter Mayle
  • Carrie by Stephen King
  • Tiger Eyes by Judy Blume
  • On My Honor by Marion Dane Bauer
  • Arizona Kid by Ron Koertge
  • Family Secrets by Norma Klein
  • Mommy Laid An Egg by Babette Cole
  • The Dead Zone by Stephen King
  • The Adventures of Tom Sawyer by Mark Twain–not even going to comment
  • Song of Solomon by Toni Morrison
  • Always Running by Luis Rodriguez
  • Private Parts by Howard Stern
  • Where’s Waldo? by Martin Hanford–this has got to be a misprint
  • Summer of My German Soldier by Bette Greene
  • Little Black Sambo by Helen Bannerman
  • Pillars of the Earth by Ken Follett
  • Running Loose by Chris Crutcher
  • Sex Education by Jenny Davis
  • The Drowning of Stephen Jones by Bette Greene
  • Girls and Sex by Wardell Pomeroy
  • How to Eat Fried Worms by Thomas Rockwell–got to be banned by a petition from PETA
  • View from the Cherry Tree by Willo Davis Roberts
  • The Headless Cupid by Zilpha Keatley Snyder
  • The Terrorist by Caroline Cooney
  • Jump Ship to Freedom by James Lincoln Collier and Christopher Collier

Man, my Amazon.com recommendations are gonna be messed up for weeks after me doing some searches to confirm what I remembered….

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