Tag: Nick Kolakowski

Slaughterhouse Blues by Nick Kolakowski: Broken Antiheroes on a Last Chance Power Drive

Slaughterhouse BluesSlaughterhouse Blues

by Nick Kolakowski
Series: A Love & Bullets Hookup, #2

Kindle Edition, 172 pg.
Shotgun Honey, 2018
Read: January 21, 2018

“What’d you put in there?” Don said, nodding at the soiled duffel bag in the backseat.

“About twenty pounds of tobacco, but don’t worry, no leaves, just the little bits. I asked the sweepers to give me the scraps.”

Don laughed. “A couple years back, we tried taking those scraps, making cigarettes out of them. They sold, but not enough. You can’t fight Big Tobacco.”

“You know what’s a good rule for life?” Fiona said. “Don’t fight groups dedicated to killing millions of people.”

It didn’t take long for Bill and Fiona to realize that the business relationship they found themselves in at the end of the last novella to be just as unpleasant as the one they’d just left. They hadn’t jumped into the fire per se, more like they’d jumped from one frying pan into another. And their new associates took a similar approach to their older associates to their exit — they wanted them dead. So now the pair are trying to avoid two large-scale criminal enterprises bent on revenge, while trying to secure enough of a nest-egg to retire and disappear.

That doesn’t sound fun. At least not for them, for readers on the other hand…

Fiona is off doing a small — but hopefully profitable — job for a couple of brothers she’s worked for before. They’re cigar manufacturers in Nicaragua, where the competition might just be getting lethal. Bill, on the other hand, is in another country trying to hide out among the throngs of tourists. Let’s just say that neither of them meet with a lot of success — but Fiona does manage to get a lead on what should be an easy heist. The catch is, it’s in New York. Right in their old backyard.

So we have an easy heist, an uneasy alliance between the couple and a less-than-trustworthy man who can lead them to a big pay, assassins on their tail and some others who discovered that the couple has delivered themselves to their city. Chaos ensues.

It’s action-packed, but with a smaller body count than the previous novel. But at least one of the deaths happens in a way that will stay with you. Not in a haunting way — but in a “wow, what a cool visual” way (something you can appreciate in fiction — in real life, it’d be horrific and witnesses would likely need therapy).

There’s an interesting tie-in here to some things that happened at the end of World War II, reminding the reader just how much moral gray area existed for US troops in those last days of the War in Europe. Well, a lot of gray existed, and some of it might have been made. Either way, it was there.

At the end of the day, I didn’t enjoy Slaughterhouse Blues nearly as much as A Brutal Bunch of Heartbroken Saps, but I think it says more about the latter than the former. It’s a solid piece of writing, expanding and deepening the universe of these characters a tad. It gives us another opportunity to see them in action while doing some important things for Fiona’s character. If nothing else, Slaughterhouse Blues sets up the third novella (which is better than either of the other two). But most importantly, it tells a good, entertaining story on its own. If I’d read this one not knowing who Bill, Fiona or Nick Kolakowski were — I’d have sought out more about them and by him. That’s good enough for me.

Disclaimer: I received a copy of this book from the author in exchange for my honest opinion.

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3 Stars

2019 Cloak & Dagger Challenge

A Brutal Bunch of Heartbroken Saps by Nick Kolakowski: A fast, fun, and bullet-ridden adventure

A Brutal Bunch of Heartbroken SapsA Brutal Bunch of Heartbroken Saps

by Nick Kolakowski
Series: A Love & Bullets Hookup, #1

Kindle Edition, 128 pg.
Shotgun Honey, 2017

Read: January 17, 2019


Bill is a con man, a hustler, a grifter with a gift — one that has been put to good use by the Rockaway Mob until the day that Bill has had enough. He just can’t keep going the way he’s been going. So he leaves New York and heads off on his secret plan to leave the country. Of course, before he left town, he helped himself to a large amount of the Mob’s money to fund his retirement. Which is as popular a choice as you can expect.

Only . . . his plan isn’t as secret as he thinks and people are on his tail immediately. A pair of employees are sent to take care of Bill and retrieve the cash. And then another is shooter is sent before those first two have even had a chance to fail. And it’s a good thing that happened.

Which is all I should probably say about the plot. Very little goes the way you think it’ll go once things get rolling. What follows is fast, fun and violent. It’s the least subtle critique of civil forfeiture possible — and a whole host of other things.

The backup assassin is our entry into this world, these characters — .he’s notorious, he’s infamous, he’s “that guy.” And . . . he’s kind of falling apart — his wife can’t handle his vocation any more and is divorcing him. His point of view chapters are a mix of attitude, a little snark, mayhem and despondency. Somehow, that mix is a blast.

On the other hand, we have Bill — who you somehow can’t believe was ever brought into the fold by the Rockaway Mob, but he’s clearly good at what he does. But little else, it seems. He has a real knack for moving from fire to fireplace to somewhere hotter yet. One of the other assassins sent after him was the one who brought him to the Rockaway Mob, who vouched for him. Her name is Fiona, and she’s one of the fiercest, deadly, aggressive characters you’ve met recently — and at least until recently, was in love with Bill (not that he treated her too well in his exit, and probably cooled her affections as a result).

This is a novella — and there’s not a lot of space for character development, for fully drawing out a character — and while these three aren’t as well drawn as Kolakowski has in other work, they’re good enough for what he’s wanting to accomplish here. (I hope that doesn’t sound like a slight — it’s not supposed to be). They may not be fully drawn, but they’re a lot of fun — and there’s some intriguing emotional beats between them and some of the other characters in these pages.

This book is primarily an exercise in violence — there’s a hint of torture, just a hint (but most of it happens off-screen). What’s not hinted at are explosions and gunfire. There’s a lot of it — the literary equivalent of so much of the stylized cinematic violence inspired by Tarantino in the 90’s. It’s adrenaline set to music — think Edgar Wright action scenes, but more lethal — to skip a couple of decades (actually, I bet this novella would pair well with much of the Baby Driver soundtrack).

I had a hard time accepting how the last few chapters went, because I had the wrong idea about what Kolakowski was up to with this book (and, I bet, the next two books that follow). But I had a blast with it — even the last chapters, once I gave up my preconceptions.

This is a fast, lean novella — there’s not an ounce of fat, not one unnecessary sentence to this. Kolakowski has a story to tell and he tells it. I knew going in that this was going to be a fast read, but I couldn’t believe how quickly I got through it — between the lean prose, the fast pace of the book and the action scenes, this was just a bullet train of a read (no pun intended).

Disclaimer: I received a copy of this book from the author. My opinions expressed above are my own. I appreciate the book, but I didn’t sell out my opinions because of that..

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3.5 Stars

LetsReadIndie Reading Challenge
2019 Cloak & Dagger Challenge

Opening Lines – A Brutal Bunch of Heartbroken Saps by Nick Kolakowski

Head & Shoulders used to tell us that, “You never get a second chance to make a first impression.” That’s true for wearing dark shirts, and it’s especially true for books. Sometimes the characters will hook the reader, sometimes the premise, sometimes it’s just knowing the author — but nothing beats a great opening for getting a reader to commit. This is one of the better openings I’ve read recently. Would it make you commit? How can you not?

Listen.

At some point, a poor sap will look at you and say, “This is the worst day of my life.”

But as long as you have breath in your lungs to say those words, you’re not having your worst day. You haven’t even hit rock bottom, much less started to dig. You can still come back from a car wreck, or that terrifying shadow on your lung X-ray, or finding your wife in bed with the well-hung quarterback from the local high school. Sometimes all you need to solve your supposedly world-ending problems is time and care, or some cash, or a shovel and a couple of garbage bags.

If you see me coming, on the other hand, I guarantee you’re having your worst day. Not to mention your last.

Let me show you how bad it can get. How deep the hole goes. And the next time your idiot friend says something about worst days, as the two of you stand there watching his house burn down with his pets and one-of-a-kind porn collection inside, you can tell him this story. It might even shut him up.

Let me tell you about Bill, my last client.

from A Brutal Bunch of Heartbroken Saps by Nick Kolakowski

A Few Quick Questions With…Nick Kolakowski

Little backstory to this Q&A, in my never-ceasing attempts to get organized, I’ve started noting when a book post is due, what I’m doing associated with it, etc on my reading log (nothing special, just an up-to-current date Excel spreadsheet, with a couple of blank lines and then a list of upcoming reads). I’d put a note on with Boise Longpig Hunting Club with the release date and a note “read early for Q&A.” Before I sent my list of Questions, I looked over my correspondence with Kolakowski and realized we hadn’t actually discussed it — thankfully, he was gracious enough to answer my questions (beer’s on me next time you’re in town) — and here they are.

Could you tell us a little about your “path to publication”? What got you into writing and what did you do to take it from an aspiration to a reality?
I’ve always wanted to be a writer. My love of crime fiction also started at a very young age, when my Dad gave me his yellowed copy of Chandler’s “Trouble Is My Business.” I’d written crime fiction since I was a teenager but I only got serious about producing a novel in my late 20s. I wrote three “trunk novels” before “A Brutal Bunch of Heartbroken Saps,” which was picked up by Shotgun Honey and published in 2017. Other novels followed.

I suspect my process mirrors that of other folks: you write a lot, query agents, send manuscripts around, and generally struggle in a very crowded market. And when you finally begin publishing books, that kicks off a whole new game: marketing, publicity, trying to get the word out. The grind never stops. Good thing it’s fun.

Why Boise, of all places? In the Acknowledgements you mention the time you’ve spent in Idaho — other than just soaking up the culture, what kind of research did you do? (I’ve got to say, as someone who’s lived most of his life in the Boise-area, you do a really good job of capturing the feel, the geography, etc. Just hopefully not the crime)
My wife was born and raised in Boise, and so I started going there with her, sometimes a couple times a year. She has friends and family all over the state, and so we spend a lot of time driving around. That’s the bulk of the research I did for the novel—with the exception of the book’s final act, which is set in a wilderness of my own invention, I don’t think there’s a location that isn’t grounded in reality. I’m sometimes startled by the changes when I come back every eight months or so—the money pouring into the state is producing seismic changes, especially in the Boise area.

I chose Boise because it’s not a place usually covered by crime fiction; I’m a little tired of novels always being set in New York, or Los Angeles, or Chicago. And for years, I’d wanted to write a thriller set in someplace more isolated and rural—which Idaho definitely provides, along with a unique texture all its own.

What’s the one (or two) book/movie/show in the last 5 years that made you say, “I wish I’d written that.”?
“Breaking Bad.” I can say that without putting too much thought into it. It’s a masterpiece.
(I might have to retire that question — between the answer, and the way you put it, I don’t know if that can be topped.)

I’ve often heard that writers (or artists in general) will forget hundreds of positive reviews but always remember the negative — what’s the worst thing that someone’s said about one of your books, and has it altered your approach to future books?

Ooof, that’s a tough one. My sense of humor is rather bleak, and at one point, an Amazon reviewer suggested that they “didn’t appreciate the crudeness and [my] choice of words at times.” And when I read that, I thought, “Well, okay, but you should have seen the first draft. That was even worse.” I do try to restrain myself a little bit more, at moments, because I realize that some readers might not appreciate when I go deliriously over-the-top.

The same goes with violence; I’m trying to be a little bit more judicious in my moments of kinetic action. If you structure it right, you can pack a lot of emotional and thematic “oomph” into just a single gunshot.

What’s next for Nick Kolakowski? (Bonus points if it involves anyone who survives Boise Longpig Hunting Club)
I’m actually writing the sequel to “Boise Longpig” right now! It’s called “Voodoo Potato,” and it’s set in New Orleans. It deals heavily with the privatization of public security, and the dangers that stem from that. When we were in New Orleans last, someone casually mentioned to us that it takes 20 minutes for the cops to arrive if you call 911, and that some local millionaire had set up a private security force in the French Quarter that can respond more quickly. Sounds like a potential Pandora’s Box to me.
Oh, that sounds great (the book, not the terrifying reality behind it).

Thanks for taking the time to answer these, and I hope that Boise Longpig Hunting Club finds all sorts of success!

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