Cooking for Cannibals

Cooking for Cannibals

by Rich Leder

eARC, 371 pg.
Laugh Riot Press, 2021

Read: December 15-17, 2020

Don’t Suspend Your Disbelief, Throw it into a Small, Locked Room Somewhere

The core premise of this book is hogwash. Scientifically impossible. Accept that and move on. Leder doesn’t try to dress it up in pseudo-scientific jargon or explanations, he just says this impossible-to-believe thing happened. The characters only believe it because of what’s in front of their eyes and make no attempt to explain it to each other, either. So pretend the universe works the way he needs it to for this story, and you can have a lot of fun.

If you can’t do that, don’t even bother picking it up. Sure, go ahead and buy it, Leder could use the sale, but don’t bother reading the book.

What’s Cooking for Cannibals About?

It’s about what happens when an ex-con gets his big break, a behavioral gerontologist who prefers rats to people takes a dramatic step, and a group of seniors embrace a second chance.

Carrie

Carrie is a behavioral gerontologist who’s working at a secret pharmaceutical laboratory coming up with a medication to combat the effects of aging. The results are phenomenal. Unbelievable—it actually appears to reverse the aging process to a degree. A significant degree.

On the weekends, Carrie works for the Copacabana, a “low rent rest home,” where her mother lives, and has grown close to a number of the residents. She can’t help but want to help them and steals the medication from the lab one night.

This sets almost everything else in motion.

Jimmy

Jimmy’s done time a couple of times—assault, burglary, that kind of thing. As a result of this, he can’t get a job unless he lies about his background. As soon as the truth comes out, he loses the job. While he’s trying to go straight, Jimmy can’t go for more than a few weeks without having to start over again, losing jobs and places he rents. He’s a “rockstar butcher” but wants to cook. He just can’t get the chance.

After his most recent dismissal/eviction, he’s given a tip about a job—there’s a retirement home in need of a cook, they provide room and board, in addition to a paycheck. This is everything he needs, if he can get the job. Which is where he meets Carrie, becomes smitten with her, and sees what happens to the residents there when they start using that medication.

Sadly, his new parole officer is determined to find him in violation of his parole for being fired/evicted and will send him back to prison. Unless, of course, Jimmy starts paying him a weekly bribe.

The Copa Crew

Carrie’s mother and her friends are the ones who make the decision to hire Jimmy after he wows them with his sample meals. And instantly, the reader enjoys them—there’s a great, familial interaction between them and it’s just charming. Once they start taking this medication? Well, they become even more entertaining.

The Fixer and the Cleaner

You can absolutely make the case that Carrie and Jimmy are their own antagonists (with some help from the Copa Crew), they’re just not cut out for this kind of thing. But formally, I guess we have to give that credit to the two bodies that funded the pharmaceutical experiments, as represented by the Fixer and the Cleaner, both in LA to make sure that no one finds out about the drug or that their employers had anything to do with any secret drug research.

The Fixer is a suave, calm, and collected Latino who enjoys creative ways of torture. The Cleaner is a Russian in love with Hollywood and all things American film (like poorly educated, heavily accented Chili Palmer), but he loves fire and burning things/people even more. Neither is the kind of guy you want to draw the attention of. Sadly, Carrie does (and because of that, so does Jimmy)

So these two come to LA to find the stolen pills, recover them, eliminate anyone who knows anything about the pills, and any other trace of them—records, people who’ve used or developed them, etc. (without realizing the other is doing the same). It’s their entrance into the story that gets everything really rolling. The question is simply, who will be alive after they’re done?

And sure, the California Legal System was also out there, looking into Jimmy and his activities. But comparatively speaking, that’s a pretty low worry.

Lecter-ish, but with a Sense of Humor

So, Cannibalism is in the title for a reason. Technically, yeah, there’s some cannibalism. But it’s not that anyone wants to eat humans, it’s just a side effect of the drug that the users become very hungry, and are not that selective where their meat comes from.

If it also turns out that eating human remains cleans up other problems by eradicating evidence? Well, that’s just a bonus.

It’s not grizzly, it’s not detailed—it’s also not justified. I think everyone involved is disgusted on some level. It’s simply they’re hungry and they have access to some well-cooked human remains.

The Two Styles of Rich Leder

This is the third novel I’ve posted about by Leder, and he seems to write two different types of books. There’s the McCall & Company series, which is a fairly straight-forward series about a would-be actress who takes over her father’s PI business after his death. It’s light fun in the vein of Stephanie Plum, but a little less wacky. I read the first book, and have intended to read the rest (my mother has read at least one, probably more, of the rest). Then there’s Let There Be Linda, a book I described as “strange, bloody, a little violent, and impossible to explain in a way that does it justice.” Which could really be said about this book, too.

It’s hard to see both of these coming from the same source. I don’t know if one’s necessarily superior to the other, but one’s a lot more marketable than the other, for sure. I’m not sure there’s a lot of overlap in the audiences for both, too. Linda and Cooking for Cannibals are marked by black comedy, one unbelievable occurrence being accepted as fact, and stories that are nigh-impossible to predict.

I do think this is largely more successful, and only slightly less imaginative, than Linda. Leder has a tighter focus on the narrative here, and it just makes the whole thing more compelling and interesting.

So, what did I think about Cooking for Cannibals?

Seriously, if you’re going to read one black comedy about anthropophagites this year, make it Cooking for Cannibals. As I wrote that, it occurred to me that late last year, I read another black comedy about anthropophagites. This is a pretty odd trend, but I can assure you that neither of them has had an impact on my diet.

There’s a lot of funny stuff in this novel. There are also few things with a pretty high “ick factor.” But what comes through most strongly? There’s a sweetness to the way that Jimmy, Carrie, and the Copa Crew interact. The relationship that springs up between Jimmy and Carrie is the focus, but there’s a nice connection between Jimmy and the people who give him his chance to cook (and they love his food), Carrie and her mother find another layer to their relationship in these pages, and so on. Sure the sweetness is buried underneath torture, killing, fire, rats, threats, and more—but it’s there.

The major note I had about the writing was that it felt like the concluding chapter ends 1-4 paragraphs too early. At least at the moment. But honestly, it’s the perfect conclusion to this story as it is. I just had to think about it for a couple of minutes first.

If you’re willing to give this kind of thing a shot, you’re going to have a pretty good time. Leder can pull off the outlandish ideas in a piece of Crime Fiction and it’s rewarding to see him do it.

If you read what I said, and you’re on the fence? You should probably avoid it.

Disclaimer: I received a copy of this novel from the author in exchange for this post and my honest opinion. While I appreciate it, my opinions are my own.


4 Stars