Category: Fiction Page 94 of 341

In a House of Lies by Ian Rankin: The Past and Present Collide for Rebus, Clarke, and Fox

In a House of LiesIn a House of Lies

by Ian Rankin

DETAILS:
Series: John Rebus, #22
Publisher: Little, Brown and Company
Publication Date: December 31, 2018
Format: Hardcover
Length: 372 pg.
Read Date: May 24-27, 2022
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What’s In a House of Lies About?

A decade and change ago, a private investigator went missing. John Rebus was part of the team that spent weeks looking for him—interviewing his client, his family, his boyfriend, the target of his current investigation, and everyone else they could think of. At least that’s what the paperwork said. There’s some question about that—and the family of Stuart Bloom has forced more than one investigation into the original search.

Now his body is discovered—in an area that had been well-searched originally. There’s reason to believe that the body had been somewhere else for years. Now the police—a team featuring DI Siobhan Clarke—have to decide where it was as well as who killed him. This involves taking a fresh look at the old case as well as a new investigation. The original detectives (those who are still alive, that is) and some of the uniformed officers are brought in for questioning—which means that Rebus is under the microscope once again. This suits him fine—it’s a chance for him to have a part in closing the case once and for all (at least in his mind)

Meanwhile, Malcolm Fox’s boss assigns him to take one final look at the original investigation—given the new discovery, can they find police misconduct at the root?

Also, Clarke’s being harassed by someone—only crank calls and vandalism, so far. She doesn’t want to do anything official about it, so she asks Rebus to look into things—if nothing else, it might keep him out of her hair while she looks for Bloom’s killer. Might.

There’s a lot to untangle in these pages, thankfully, Rankin’s three detectives are on the cases.

What did I think about In a House of Lies?

This post feels entirely too short. I’m struggling here. What do I say about Rankin or Rebus (or Clarke or Fox) that I haven’t already said? I’m willing to believe that I’ve asked this question when discussing at least 3 previous books. I’m sorely tempted to just post something like: “Ian Rankin wrote a book about John Rebus. You know what to do.”

I was particularly impressed at the way Rankin got the band (on both sides of the law) back together here—for the reader, it’s expected—probably even inevitable. But it comes across as organic and unforced. Between Rebus’ retirement, and the divergent paths that the others’ careers have taken, that’s no mean feat. Unlike, say, Renée Ballard, Siobhan Clarke isn’t soldiering on with those she can’t trust. Ballard has to get Bosch involved, Clarke chooses to ask for his help and/or lets him push his way in.

Solid mysteries, expertly plotted and executed, full of characters (new and old) that you believe and get invested in. In a House of Lies feels as fresh and as compelling as Knots and Crosses.


4 Stars

This post contains an affiliate link. If you purchase from it, I will get a small commission at no additional cost to you. As always, opinions expressed are my own.

A Snake in the Raspberry Patch by Joanne Jackson: A Family and a Small Town in Upheaval In the Shadow of a Brutal Crime

Let me begin with an apology. I’d assured the publicist that got me this book that I’d have this posted pre-release and somehow scheduled to start reading it a month after publication. That makes this post 5-6 weeks overdue. My sincere apologies to Wiley Sanchez, Stonehouse Publishing, and Joanne Jackson.


A Snake in the Raspberry PatchA Snake in the Raspberry Patch

by Joanne Jackson

DETAILS:
Publisher: Stonehouse Originals
Publication Date: May 1, 2022
Format: eARC
Length:300
Read Date: May 28-31, 2022
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What’s A Snake in the Raspberry Patch About?

It bothers me that for the second book in a row, I’m taking the easy way out and using Publisher’s Description here, but the draft I just deleted was too cumbersome and long to bother you with.

It is the summer of 1971 and Liz takes care of her four sisters while waiting to meet the sixth Murphy child: a boy. And yet, something is not right. Adults tensely whisper in small groups, heads shaking. Her younger sister, Rose seems more annoying, always flashing her camera and jotting notes in her notepad. The truth is worse than anyone could imagine: an entire family slaughtered in their home nearby, even the children. The small rural community reels in the aftermath. No one seems to know who did it or why. For Liz, these events complicate her already tiring life. Keeping Rose in line already feels like a full time job, and if Rose gets it in her head that she can solve a murder… The killer must be someone just passing through, a random horror. It almost begs the question: where do murderers live?

The Setting

A Saskatchewan farm town in the 1970s is not a likely setting for a novel about a murder—much less several murders. A 1980s Hawkins, Indiana is a more likely setting for a pan-dimensional showdown, really. I mean, Canada is unlikely enough for a murder mystery*, but rural Canada in the Seventies?

* Yes, I’m aware that even Canadians are murderers/the victims of murders. But c’mon, who thinks about it when it comes to fictional crime? Ireland, Scotland, England? Sure. The U.S.? Of course. Even Scandi Noir is a thing. But no one’s ever thought about Great White North Noir.

This setting was particularly effective—there’s an isolation to the community, it’s tight-knit, and there’s a self-reliance that it displays as well. The police/RCMP are referred to, but not really seen—this is a town that has no need for police, and even when there is one, you can’t tell. I kept slipping into thinking that the town was smaller than it must’ve been—but even there, that works. You get the atmosphere where everyone knows everyone else’s business, yet they don’t know (cannot believe) anyone who would kill anyone else—particularly a woman and her children. They know what family needs help dealing with a death or birth without having to be asked, but they don’t know who might murder anyone.

That setting seems like it’s just as likely there that a smart girl with a camera and an unhealthy interest in crime would solve the crime before anyone else would. Maybe even more likely.

The Murderer’s Identity and The Reveal

Jackson provides plenty of clues to the killer’s identity early on and keeps leaving them in the open—she doesn’t care if the reader guesses or not—and by the end she might as well have written a Brontë-esque, “Reader, ____ murdered them.” Because that’s not important.

Well, it’s important, but that’s not what she was writing about.

We’re supposed to lock in on Liz and Rose. What they’re dealing with during and following that summer. The clues they inadvertently or intentionally collect. And how they put the pieces together and their reaction to the solution (and their family’s reaction, too). I thought it was a good novel all along, but in the last couple of chapters—the Reveal—my estimation rose significantly.

So, what did I think about A Snake in the Raspberry Patch?

I’m not sure how important this is, but I thought I should mention it. Just because the would-be sleuth is a juvenile, it’d be a mistake to think this was a YA or MG novel—I think it could be read by an older MG reader or a YA reader, but it’s not targeted at that audience.

I’ve already mentioned a few of the ways that this is an atypical mystery novel, there are a few others, too. This is more about growing up in the shadow of a crime—and other trauma—rather than it is a mystery novel. It’s more Ordinary Grace than The Sweetness at the Bottom of the Pie (although Rose would love Flavia de Luce (either as a fictional character or a co-belligerent). But in the closing pages, it feels more like a murder mystery than some sort of “non-genre” work. And the mystery aspects of the novel here are far more effective than anything Krueger did in Ordinary Grace (I enjoyed the whole novel more, too)

There’s a starkness to this world and novel that makes everything a bit more haunting—that’s the Saskatchewan farm town as well as Liz’s outlook.

There’s one line of dialogue—it’s after the climactic events that leads to the reveal. That line sets up the reveal, actually. (I’m trying to be vague here) My gut tells me that a reader’s reaction to this one line is going to determine what they think of the book. I’ve gone back and forth about it in the last couple of days—it’s either a perfectly worded setup, or it’s too on-the-nose. As I write this, I’m leaning towards both—it’s necessary, and the on-the-nose-ness is the most economical way of accomplishing what it does. I’m likely spending more time on that sentence than is called for.

It took me a little bit to “get” this novel, but the more I read, the more the situation and characters burrowed into my mind, and at this point, I think they’re going to linger in my mind longer than usual. And I’m okay with that. This’ll haunt you, folks, in a good way. Give it a shot.

Disclaimer: I received this eARC from the author via Wiley Saichek and Saichek Publicity in exchange for this post—while I appreciate that, the opinions expressed are wholly mine.


3.5 Stars

This post contains an affiliate link. If you purchase from it, I will get a small commission at no additional cost to you. As always, opinions are my own.

Jacked edited by Vern Smith: A Dynamite Collection of Short Crime Fiction

JackedJacked

edited by Vern Smith

DETAILS:
Publisher: Runamok Books
Publication Date: July 1, 2022
Format: eARC
Length: 258 pg.
Read Date: May 23-26, 2022
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What is Jacked?

Run Amok Books is a indie press from New Jersey, and they’ve recently launched a crime imprint. Jacked is their “inaugural anthology,” with 20 stories of all sorts of Crime/Thriller Fiction on display.

There’s some gritty realism, there’s some noir, there’s a police procedural/samurai mash-up set in the 80s, and there’s even a “cozy espionage” (a subgenre I learned was a thing in this book). You’ve got stories featuring cops, bikers, hipsters, thrill-seeking teens, kids just trying to survive, a mechanic, addicts, rookie publicists, and rookie criminals.

Some were harrowing. some were bleak, some made me grin, several shocked me, some depressed me, some made me recoil, and I didn’t really know how to react to a couple of them.

Basically, no matter how particular your Crime Fiction Taste is, you’re going to find at least one story in here that’s going to appeal to you.

Stories that I Have to Talk About

I thought about writing a sentence or two about each story but decided that never works out well for anyone—the post becomes too long to read and to write. Also, there are a handful that I’d end up ruining by saying something (a shocking twist in a 6-page story doesn’t carry an impact when you know it’s coming).

Looking over my notes, I found myself singing “One of these things is not like the others,” when I came to “Nick Flaherty and the Body in the Lab” by Anne Louise Bannon. While you get all sorts of things in an anthology, this seemed more unlike the rest than any other story. So it stands out just for that—but I think this would’ve stood out to me regardless. I like the protagonist’s style, the narrative voice, and the world that Bannon created here. This is a spin-off of her Operation Quickline series, and I’ve added the first one to my “Buy This” list.

I really should pay more attention to titles, I know (I really only think of them in retrospect). But sometimes it pays off—there’s a better than even chance that I’d have rolled my eyes at Matt Witten’s “The TikTok Murder” if I had. I’m an old crank, I can’t take TikTok seriously—and the murder of an up-and-coming TikTok star isn’t going to get me excited. But the single note I wrote about this when I was finished was “this is exactly what I wanted to read today.”

“Samurai ’81” by Andrew Miller is one of the best concepts I’ve run across this year—you’ve got a young LAPD detective being mentored by an older, but not that-jaded detective. Not just in how to be a better homicide detective, but in being a Japanese-American detective in the early 80s. Then you throw in modern-day samurai—with the swords and everything. Who puts these things together? And how isn’t this a series already? (seriously, I have money ready to spend)

I had to limit myself to these—there are another half-dozen I could go on about.

So, what did I think about Jacked?

As with just about every anthology, in this Whitman’s Sampler of Crime, there are going to be a couple of stories that you’re going to want to spit out after taking a bite. I won’t name those for me—because I know there are those people in the world who like those orange creams or cherry cordials, even if I don’t understand them. Percentage-wise, they were smaller than I’m used to in a collection as eclectic as this one.

But even the worst story was so well-written, so well-executed that I can’t write it off as bad, just…very not-for-me. But the rest were absolutely worth my time—every single one was a well-written short story and I could see where it would rise to the top of a submissions pile. Jacked is one of those collections that I’m going to remember for a while.

If this anthology is any indication, Run Amok Crime is one to keep an eye on as are every one of the contributors.

This post contains an affiliate link. If you purchase from it, I will get a small commission at no additional cost to you. As always, opinions expressed are my own.

20 Books of Summer 2022: Kickoff

20 Books of Summer
Cathy at 746 Books is hosting 20 Books of Summer again. This challenge has been fun the last couple of years, and has proved to be a good way for me to actually read some of those “I need to read those one day” books. I’m being very ambitious this year with some of my selections, but some of those are pulling double-duty and are taking care of another reading challenge, too. It’s going to be an actual challenge to get all of these read, but I think I’m up for it. It’s a little risky with two trilogies and three books from another new-to-me series—I could end up really disliking myself, but I really want to clean up some of my shelves, you know?

I’m going with the unofficial US Dates for Summer—Memorial Day to Labor Day (today through September 5th), just because it’s easier for me to think that way. And I’ve needed those first few days of September the last two years, but let’s not think about that. Well, I say I’m starting today, but it’s going to be next Tuesday at the earliest that I get to read one of these books…proper planning and all that…

This summer, my 20 are going to be:

1. The Deepest Grave by Harry Bingham
2. Condemned by R.C. Bridgstock
3. Payback by R.C. Bridgstock
4. Persecution by R.C. Bridgstock
5. AMORALMAN: A True Story and Other Lies by Derek DelGaudio
6. Against All Odds by Jeffery H. Haskell
7. One Decisive Victory by Jeffery H. Haskell
8. With Grimm Resolve by Jeffery H. Haskell
9. A World Without Whom: The Essential Guide to Language in the Buzzfeed Age by Emmy J. Favilla
10. Composite Creatures by Caroline Hardaker
11. Divine and Conquer by J.C. Jackson
12. Mortgaged Mortality by J.C. Jackson
13. The Ghost Machine by James Lovegrove
14. Roses for the Dead by Chris McDonald
15. A Wash of Black by Chris McDonald
16. Whispers in the Dark by Chris McDonald
17. Down the River unto the Sea by Walter Mosely
18. Crazy in Poughkeepsie by Daniel Pinkwater
19. Ghost of a Chance by Dan Willis
20. The Border by Don Winslow

(subject to change, as is allowed, but I’m going to resist the impulse to tweak as much as I can).
20 Books of Summer '22 Chart

PUB DAY SPOTLIGHT: A Long Way from Home by Brian W. Caves

It’s publication day for Brian W. Caves’s A Long Way from Home, and I’m glad to help spread the word about the book. Make sure to give this a look!

Book Details:

Title: A Long Way from Home by Brian W. Caves
Genre: Mystery
Publisher: Red Dragon Publishing
Release date: May 27, 2022
Format: Paperback/Ebook
Length: 363 pages
A Long Way from Home Cover

About the Book

A sleepy town in 1960s South Georgia, where to some residents, segregation is more important than catching a killer.

An ex-homicide detective from Chicago called to honour an old promise.

With a rising body count and a community guarding their secrets more fiercely than their children, asking questions could prove deadly for the outsider…

What the Reviewers Are Saying:

★★★★★ A book that grabbed me and took me back in time, it will enthral you

★★★★★ Outstanding! Caves has weaved a gripping story. I simply could not put it down

★★★★★ A powerful read

★★★★★ Thought-provoking and unmissable from the first page until the last

Purchase Links:

Amazon US ~ Amazon UK

About the Author

Brian W. CravesI started out as an engineer, then an estate agent, followed by senior management roles in cable TV and telecoms. Spent a few years as a management consultant and now work in the language translation industry.

I have played music all my life. Classically trained on the clarinet from the age of eight until fourteen when my world took a quantum leap forward after hearing Jimi Hendrix and Voodoo Child on the radio. I thought, wow, I gotta do that. I dumped the clarinet and I picked up the guitar and have never put it down. I have played alongside topflight musicians, both live and in studios.

From a young age I read books like Treasure Island, Robinson Crusoe, Black Beauty, Swallows and Amazons, then The Famous Five, Billy Bunter, Jennings and Derbyshire, Biggles, and Tarzan. Agatha Christie had a major impact as did Georges Simenon. I penned short stories at school – mostly adventure, but it wasn’t until I became hooked on American Crime Noir that my urge to write came crashing to the forefront of my mind. Reading Hammett, Chandler, Jim Thompson, Macdonald, and the master, James M. Cain had the same effect on my potential writing career as Hendrix had for my music.

Currently, having been further influenced by the greats of Southern literature, I write crime stories based in the Deep South as well as UK based dark noir crime set in the county of Northamptonshire where I reside. Throw into the pot crime and horror short stories and novellas and you’ll have some idea of what goes on in my head.



My thanks to Red Dragon Publishing for the invitation to participate in this Spotlight and the materials they provided.

Red Dragon Publishing

Don’t Know Tough by Eli Cranor: Glory Days, Well, They’ll Pass You By…

Don't Know ToughDon’t Know Tough

by Eli Cranor

DETAILS:
Publisher: Soho Crime
Publication Date: March 22, 2022
Format: Hardcover
Length: 322 pg.
Read Date: May 19-23, 2022 
Support Independent Bookstores - Visit IndieBound.org


I feel like I said too much here—I didn’t give away any plot points (I don’t think), but I still think I maybe said too much. I don’t know how else to talk about this novel. Also, I don’t think it matters what I say, just read the first two pages of Don’t Know Tough and it won’t matter what I put here—you’re going to have to read the rest or will just walk away.

Either way, you’re probably wasting time if you read this post when you could just read the @#$&! book.

What’s Don’t Know Tough About?

Billy Lowe is a running back for a small-town Arkansas High School Football team. He’s practically half the team by himself. They wouldn’t be in the State Championship playoffs without him—and they won’t win anything without him, either.

So when he gets himself in trouble—with the school and potentially the legal system—for repeatedly giving a beating to the son of one of the area’s richest men, their first-year coach’s dreams of glory are in jeopardy.

Then, the boyfriend of Billy’s mother is found dead—likely murdered. Things go from dismal to worse.

Billy

Billy has been valued for one thing in his life—he’s a great football player. He’s the son of a high school football legend. The younger brother of a phenomenal high school player. After High School, he will likely produce a few kids who will go on to be high school football players.

He’s also the target of his mother’s drunken and abusive boyfriend. Everyone living in their trailer is. Her boyfriend (Billy refuses to use his name) replaced the drunken abusive father and husband who abandoned them years ago.

His life is defined by football and abuse. Everything else is just filler.

It’s no wonder then that Billy is full of rage and need for some kind of affection beyond his mother’s imperfect attempts to express her love.

He doesn’t know how to live. He doesn’t know how to be an adult. He knows how to be hurt and how to hurt. We see that immediately in the first two pages—the next 320 are just the repercussions of that.

Coach Trent Powers

Coach Trent sees himself in Billy. His teenaged years featured several different Foster Homes until his high school coach brought him into his home and family and changed his life. He found stability, family, and Christianity. He went on to marry his coach’s daughter.

Trent wants to copy and paste his experience onto Billy (except that whole marrying the coach’s daughter thing—there’s no way that Mrs. Powers would accept that). He has far less time to replicate that scenario than his coach had, but he still thinks he can make it work.

He fails to see the things that separate Billy and his teenaged-self. More importantly, he fails to see the differences between himself and his coach. He is earnest, idealistic, and desperate—he thinks he can impose success on the situation if he wants it enough, if he believes it enough.

At one point, Trent tries to evangelize Billy. It epitomizes this whole endeavor and is one of the more painful scenes in a novel that has an overabundance of painful scenes. I wanted to call a time-out, stop the scene and talk to Trent for a minute. This is not how you present the Gospel, sir, as if simply saying “Jesus” will solve every problem. Go read 1 Corinthians 15:1-11 and try again, stop rushing it. I think he’s genuine, I think this is a heartfelt attempt on his part to help Billy, I am convinced that Trent thinks he’s doing the right thing—but he’s approaching the whole thing incorrectly.

Trent sees himself as the Evangelical Louanne Johnson/Jaime Escalante/Principal Joe Clark/Sister Mary Clarence mixed with Coach Eric Taylor, who will rescue this kid. Sadly, he’s really just a combination of Ned Flanders and Michael Scott. I liked him, wanted him to succeed, and never thought for a moment he would/could, or should.

Race

You hear football, the South, and Crime Fiction and you think this book is going to be about race/racism—at least in part. And you’d be wrong—as hard as that is to believe.

But you’d also be almost right. One of the more impressive things about Don’t Know Tough is the subtle way it is and it isn’t about race in the South.

So, what did I think about Don’t Know Tough?

I was blown away by this. I should stop there before I go overboard with praise. But, I’m not going to. Feel free to stop reading now, though, I’m not going to improve on those six words.

I should probably start off by saying, as un-American as it is, I don’t like football. I don’t see why it’s popular, I wish so many young people in this country wouldn’t sign themselves up for the lasting physical and mental damage that it brings. I do not understand the religious fervor that grips fans of the sport—particularly in Texas and the South when it comes to high school and college teams. And frankly, I don’t know that I want to.

But hey, Dani Rojas speaks for millions when he says, “Football is life.” (even if he’s talking about the other football). So bring on the books about it—especially if you’re going to write them the way that Eli Cranor does. If you’re going to give me something this good, I don’t care what subculture, sport, or location it is—I’m going to lap it up.

As I stumbled through saying above, Don’t Know Tough is about race, it’s definitely about class and family. But it’s primarily about being an adult, about being a man, and how one gets to that stage in life—about mentorship and being mentored. Both Trent and Billy find themselves in situations where they have a greater degree of responsibility than they’re accustomed to or prepared for. Billy is thrust into it by his actions and other people’s actions. Trent decides to take it upon himself. At the same time, everyone around them recognizes them as still being (essentially) children and treats them accordingly.

This is a novel about heartbreak, despair, about clinging to a dream as it crumbles around you (whether or not you realize that’s what’s going on). There is a sense of inevitability about everything that happens to Billy, Trent, and their families—even if any of them realized what was happening and tried to change things, it just wouldn’t matter.

And all of it is told in prose that is beautiful, visceral, empathetic, and honest—I cannot convey to you the greatness of Cranor’s writing properly. I’ll either not be effusive enough in my praise, or I’ll come across as over-hyping it. He invites the reader to think about Hemingway* as you read this—in terms of themes, story, and character—but I’d like to think I’d have gotten there on my own.

* The Old Man and the Sea in particular, but I think it’s safe to bring other works into the conversation.

This is a brutal novel. As I read, I wanted it to end sooner than it did to just stop the suffering of these poor characters. But I wanted to read another couple hundred pages of Cranor’s writing.

Reading Don’t Know Tough is like watching a series of defensive highlights on the NFL Network—hit after hit after hit after bone-crushing hit. It will leave you psychically battered and bruised—and oddly wanting more.


5 Stars

This post contains an affiliate link. If you purchase from it, I will get a small commission at no additional cost to you. As always, opinions expressed are my own.

Towel Day ’22: Some of my favorite Adams lines . . .

(updated 5/25/22)

There’s a great temptation here for me to go crazy and use so many quotations that I’d get in copyright trouble. I’ll refrain from that and just list some of his best lines . . .*

* The fact that this list keeps expanding from year to year says something about my position on flirting with temptation.

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy

Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so.

This must be Thursday. . . I never could get the hang of Thursdays.

“You’d better be prepared for the jump into hyperspace. It’s unpleasantly like being drunk.”

“What’s so unpleasant about being drunk?”

“You ask a glass of water.”

(I’m not sure why, but this has always made me chuckle, if not actually laugh out loud. It’s just never not funny. It’s possibly the line that made me a fan of Adams)

He had found a Nutri-Matic machine which had provided him with a plastic cup filled with a liquid that was almost, but not quite, entirely unlike tea.

In those days spirits were brave, the stakes were high, men were real men, women were real women and small furry creatures from Alpha Centauri were real small furry creatures from Alpha Centuari. And all dared to brave unknown terrors, to do mighty deeds, to boldly split infinitives that no man had split before . . .

“Look,” said Arthur, “would it save you a lot of time if I just gave up and went mad now?”

The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don’t.

For a moment, nothing happened. Then, after a second or so, nothing continued to happen.

He attacked everything in life with a mix of extraordinary genius and naive incompetence, and it was often difficult to tell which was which.


The Restaurant at the End of the Universe

The Restaurant at the End of the Universe

It is a curious fact, and one to which no one knows quite how much importance to attach, that something like 85 percent of all known worlds in the Galaxy, be they primitive or highly advanced, have invented a drink called jynnan tonnyx, or gee-N-N-T’Nix, or jinond-o-nicks, or any one of a thousand or more variations on the same phonetic theme. The drinks themselves are not the same, and vary between the Sivolvian “chinanto/mnigs” which is ordinary water served at slightly above room temperature, and the Gagrakackan “tzjin-anthony-ks” which kills cows at a hundred paces; and in fact the one common factor between all of them, beyond the fact that the names sound the same, is that they were all invented and named before the worlds concerned made contact with any other worlds.

Reality is frequently inaccurate.

Life is wasted on the living.


Life, The Universe and Everything

Life, the Universe, and Everything

The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy has this to say on the subject of flying. There is an art, it says, or rather, a knack to flying. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.

(It goes on for quite a while after this—and I love every bit of it.)

“One of the interesting things about space,” Arthur heard Slartibartfast saying . . . “is how dull it is?”

“Dull?” . . .

“Yes,” said Slartibartfast, “staggeringly dull. Bewilderingly so. You see, there’s so much of it and so little in it.”


So Long, and Thanks For All The Fish

So Long, and Thanks for All the Fish

Of course, one never has the slightest notion what size or shape different species are going to turn out to be, but if you were to take the findings of the latest Mid-Galactic Census report as any kind of accurate guide to statistical averages you would probably guess that the craft would hold about six people, and you would be right. You’d probably guessed that anyway. The Census report, like most such surveys, had cost an awful lot of money and told nobody anything they didn’t already know—except that every single person in the Galaxy had 2.4 legs and owned a hyena. Since this was clearly not true the whole thing eventually had to be scrapped.

Here was something that Ford felt he could speak about with authority. “Life,” he said, “is like a grapefruit.”

“Er, how so?”

“Well, it’s sort of orangy-yellow and dimpled on the outside, wet and squidgy in the middle. It’s got pips inside, too. Oh, and some people have half a one for breakfast.”

“Is there anyone else out there I can talk to?”

Arthur had a swordfish steak and said it made him angry. He grabbed a passing waitress by the arm and berated her. “Why’s this fish so bloody good?” he demanded, angrily.

“Please excuse my friend,” said Fenchurch to the startled waitress. “I think he’s having a nice day at last.”


Mostly Harmless

Mostly Harmless

A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools.

Fall, though, is the worst. Few things are worse than fall in New York. Some of the things that live in the lower intestines of rats would disagree, but most of the things that live in the lower intestines of rats are highly disagreeable anyways, so their opinion can and should be discounted.


Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency

Dirk Gently’s Holistic Detective Agency

There is no point in using the word ‘impossible’ to describe something that has clearly happened.

If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, we have at least to consider the possibility that we have a small aquatic bird of the family anatidae on our hands.

Let’s think the unthinkable, let’s do the undoable. Let us prepare to grapple with the ineffable itself, and see if we may not eff it after all.

(I’ve often been tempted to get a tattoo of this)


The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul

The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul

There are some people you like immediately, some whom you think you might learn to like in the fullness of time, and some that you simply want to push away from you with a sharp stick.

It can hardly be a coincidence that no language on earth has ever produced the expression, ‘As pretty as an airport.’

The impossible often has a kind of integrity to it which the merely improbable lacks.

She stared at them with the worried frown of a drunk trying to work out why the door is dancing.

It was his subconscious which told him this—that infuriating part of a person’s brain which never responds to interrogation, merely gives little meaningful nudges and then sits humming quietly to itself, saying nothing.

As she lay beneath a pile of rubble, in pain, darkness, and choking dust, trying to find sensation in her limbs, she was at least relieved to be able to think that she hadn’t merely been imagining that this was a bad day. So thinking, she passed out.


The Last Chance to See

The Last Chance to See

“So what do we do if we get bitten by something deadly?” I asked.

He looked at me as if I were stupid. “You die, of course. That’s what deadly means.”

I’ve never understood all this fuss people make about the dawn. I’ve seen a few and they’re never as good as the photographs, which have the additional advantage of being things you can look at when you’re in the right frame of mind, which is usually around lunchtime.

I have the instinctive reaction of a Western man when confronted with sublimely incomprehensible. I grab my camera and start to photograph it.

Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so.

The aye-aye is a nocturnal lemur. It is a very strange-looking creature that seems to have been assembled from bits of other animals. It looks a little like a large cat with a bat’s ears, a beaver’s teeth, a tail like a large ostrich feather, a middle finger like a long dead twig and enormous eyes that seem to peer past you into a totally different world which exists just over your left shoulder.

One of the characteristics that laymen find most odd about zoologists is their insatiable enthusiasm for animal droppings. I can understand, of course, that the droppings yield a great deal of information about the habits and diets of the animals concerned, but nothing quite explains the sheer glee that the actual objects seem to inspire.

I mean, animals may not be intelligent, but they’re not as stupid as a lot of human beings.


The Salmon of Doubt

The Salmon of Doubt: Hitchhiking the Galaxy One Last Time

I’ve come up with a set of rules that describe our reactions to technologies:
1. Anything that is in the world when you’re born is normal and ordinary and is just a natural part of the way the world works.
2. Anything that’s invented between when you’re fifteen and thirty-five is new and exciting and revolutionary and you can probably get a career in it.
3. Anything invented after you’re thirty-five is against the natural order of things.


And a couple of lines I’ve seen in assorted places, articles, books, and whatnot

I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by.

A learning experience is one of those things that says, “You know that thing you just did? Don’t do that.”

The fact is, I don’t know where my ideas come from. Nor does any writer. The only real answer is to drink way too much coffee and buy yourself a desk that doesn’t collapse when you beat your head against it.

Solutions nearly always come from the direction you least expect, which means there’s no point trying to look in that direction because it won’t be coming from there.

Towel Day ’22: Do You Know Where Your Towel Is?

(updated and revised this 5/25/22)

The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy has a few things to say on the subject of towels.

A towel, it says, is about the most massively useful thing an interstellar hitchhiker can have. Partly it has great practical value. You can wrap it around you for warmth as you bound across the cold moons of Jaglan Beta; you can lie on it on the brilliant marble-sanded beaches of Santraginus V, inhaling the heady sea vapors; you can sleep under it beneath the stars which shine so redly on the desert world of Kakrafoon; use it to sail a miniraft down the slow heavy River Moth; wet it for use in hand-to-hand-combat; wrap it round your head to ward off noxious fumes or avoid the gaze of the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal (such a mind-bogglingly stupid animal, it assumes that if you can’t see it, it can’t see you); you can wave your towel in emergencies as a distress signal, and of course dry yourself off with it if it still seems to be clean enough.

More importantly, a towel has immense psychological value. For some reason, if a strag (strag: non-hitch hiker) discovers that a hitch hiker has his towel with him, he will automatically assume that he is also in possession of a toothbrush, face flannel, soap, tin of biscuits, flask, compass, map, ball of string, gnat spray, wet weather gear, space suit etc., etc. Furthermore, the strag will then happily lend the hitch hiker any of these or a dozen other items that the hitch hiker might accidentally have “lost”. What the strag will think is that any man who can hitch the length and breadth of the galaxy, rough it, slum it, struggle against terrible odds, win through, and still knows where his towel is is clearly a man to be reckoned with.

Hence a phrase that has passed into hitchhiking slang, as in “Hey, you sass that hoopy Ford Prefect? There’s a frood who really knows where his towel is.” (Sass: know, be aware of, meet, have sex with; hoopy: really together guy; frood: really amazingly together guy.)

Towel Day, for the few who don’t know, is the annual celebration of Douglas Adams’ life and work. It was first held two weeks after his death, fans were to carry a towel with them for the day to use as a talking point to encourage those who have never read HHGTTG to do so, or to just converse with someone about Adams. Adams is one of that handful of authors that I can’t imagine I’d be the same without having encountered/read/re-read/re-re-re-re-read, and so I do my best to pay a little tribute to him each year, even if it’s just carrying around a towel.

Some time in 7th or 8th grade (I believe), I was at a friend’s house and his brother let us try his copy of the text-based Hitchhiker’s Guide game, and we were no good at it at all. Really, it was embarrassing. However, his brother had a copy of the novel, and we all figured that the novel held the keys we needed for success with the game (alas, for us it did not). My friends all decided that I’d be the one to read the book and come back in a few days as an expert.

I quickly forgot about the game. Adams’ irreverent style rocked my world—could people actually get away with saying some of these things? His skewed take on the world, his style, his humor…and a depressed robot, too! It was love at first read.

It was one of those experiences that, looking back, I can say shaped my reading and thinking for the rest of my life (make of that what you will). Were my life the subject of a Doctor Who or Legends of Tomorrow episode, it’d be one of those immutable fixed points. I read the books (particularly the first) so many times that I can quote significant portions of it, and frequently do so without noticing that I’m doing that. I have (at this time) two literary-inspired tattoos, one of which is the planet logo*. In essence, I’m saying that Adams has had an outsized influence on my life and is probably my biggest enduring fandom. If carrying around a (massively useful) piece of cloth for a day in some small way honors his memory? Sure, I’m in.

* I didn’t know it at the time, but Adams didn’t like that guy. Whoops.

One of my long-delayed goals is to write up a good all-purpose Tribute to Douglas Adams and his work post, and another Towel Day has come without me doing so. Belgium. Next year . . . or later. (he says for at least the 8th straight year, a work ethic I like to believe Adams would endorse).

In the meantime, here’s some of what I’ve written about Adams. A few years back, I did a re-read of all of Adams’ (completed) fiction. For reasons beyond my ken (or recollection), I didn’t get around to blogging about the Dirk Gently books, but I did do the Hitchhiker’s Trilogy:
bullet The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy
bullet The Restaurant at the End of the Universe
bullet Life, The Universe and Everything
bullet So Long, and Thanks For All The Fish
bullet Mostly Harmless
bullet I had a thing or two to say about the 40th Anniversary of The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy
bullet Last year, I took a look at the 42nd Anniversary Illustrated Edition of The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy
Also, I should mention the one book Adams/Hitchhiker’s aficionado needs to read is Don’t Panic by Neil Gaiman, David K. Dickson and MJ Simpson. If you’re more in the mood for a podcast, I’d suggest The Waterstones Podcast How We Made: The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy—I’ve listened to several podcast episodes about this book, and generally roll my eyes at them. But this is just fantastic. Were it available, I’d listen to a Peter Jackson-length version of the episode.

I’ve only been able to get one of my sons into Adams, he’s the taller, thinner one in the picture from a few years ago.

You really need to check out this comic from Sheldon Comics—part of the Anatomy of Authors series: The Anatomy of Douglas Adams.

TowelDay.org is the best collection of resources on the day. One of my favorite posts there is this pretty cool video, shot on the ISS by astronaut Samantha Cristoforetti.

Even better—here’s an appearance by Douglas Adams himself from the old Letterman show—I’m so glad someone preserved this:

Love the anecdote (Also, I want this tie.)

Nothing to See Here (Audiobook) by Kevin Wilson, Marin Ireland: This Family Drama Hits All the Right Notes

Nothing to See HereNothing to See Here

by Kevin Wilson, Marin Ireland (Narrator)

DETAILS:
Publisher: HarperAudio
Publication Date: October 29, 2019
Format: Unabridged Audiobook
Length: 6 hr., 40 min.
Read Date: May 16-17, 2022
Support Independent Bookstores - Visit IndieBound.org

What’s Nothing to See Here About?

Over a decade ago Lillian and Madison were roommates at a boarding school for the upper crust (or scholarship kids like Lillian). They were incredibly close until Lillian was expelled. Even then, Madison wrote Lillian regularly and Lillian responded sometimes. They didn’t see each other, only corresponded.

Madison’s gone on to success in politics—first as a campaign staffer, now as the wife of a Senator, who is likely to be tapped for a Cabinet position. Lillian…well, she’s not done really well for herself. The controversy over her expulsion followed her through school—she didn’t get the scholarships she needed to get out of her situation. She’s still living with her mother—which is a pretty contentious relationship.

Now Madison writes with a job offer/plea for help. The Senator’s previous wife has recently died and he needs to take custody of their children. Madison would like Lillian to act as a governess (Lillian keeps saying “nanny,” much to Madison’s consternation) for them, at least until her husband’s nomination is confirmed by the Senate.

There’s a catch. The twins will sometimes burst into flames. Like Johnny Storm without the flying or the trip into space that goes horribly wrong.

They won’t suffer any injury from it, but the same can’t be said for their clothing or anything near them. Lillian needs to keep them out of the press, away from Madison’s son, and hopefully under control. They want to/need to take care of the twins, but really don’t want to have anything to do with them.

This will be the best-paying job Lillian ever has held. She knows nothing about working with kids—and the only models she’s ever had for it are horrible. But she’ll do whatever Madison asks (and she could use the money). Also, she knows what it’s like to be a kid who needs a break—maybe she can help these kids out.

A Pleasant Twist

So you have a couple of kids who burst into flames from time to time. 97% of authors are going to devote the novels to the rest of the characters spending the bulk of the book trying to figure out how or why that happens, and what they can do to stop it/duplicate it/fight crime with it.

Wilson’s in that other 3%, thankfully. Yes, there are some efforts to learn why it happens, but that’s never the focus—and most of the time, those who are investigating aren’t characters who were supposed to be that sympathetic.

The focus remains on the kids as kids—how does Lillian help them feel safe? Wanted? Normal? She does work with them on not bursting into flame—but it’s not so much about the ability/affliction, but about helping them to be comfortable in their own skins—whatever temperature it is. It’s about self-acceptance (which leads to control).

How Was the Narration?

Normally, it takes me a chapter or two to “get into” a new-to-me narrator, or at least to decide what I think of the narration overall. But Ireland won me over within the first couple of minutes—as a certain janitor says, “I don’t know what IT is, but [s]he’s got it.”

She’s a narrator I’ll keep my eyes out for. I don’t know that I’ve seen her in anything, but I saw today that she’s going to be in the Justified revival—I’m looking forward to that.

So, what did I think about Nothing to See Here?

One of the reasons that I put off reading/listening to this book for so long, was that I remember The Family Fang falling apart in the end—or at least not ending as good as the first 80% or so of the book was*. I was more than a little apprehensive that the same thing would apply here. Thankfully, I was wrong.

* My memory of it is hazy, that’s just the sense I have—I could be wrong.

This book started strong and kept getting better—it didn’t end like I thought it would but ended the only way it could’ve (in retrospect). The only way it could’ve been better is for the middle bit to be longer and more detailed. These are fantastic characters, and the concept is just as fantastic. These kids belong in a speculative work of some kind—SF or Fantasy (Urban or otherwise). But no, Wilson puts them in the middle of a family drama. And it’s great to see. Funny, warm, and heartfelt—Nothing to See Here scored on all fronts for me.


4 1/2 Stars

This post contains an affiliate link. If you purchase from it, I will get a small commission at no additional cost to you. As always, opinions are my own.

The Traitor’s Heir by Anna Thayer: He’s Gonna Have to Serve Somebody

The Traitor's HeirThe Traitor’s Heir

by Anna Thayer

DETAILS:
Series: The Knight of Eldaran, #1
Publisher: Lion Fiction
Publication Date: May 15, 2014
Format: Paperback
Length: 541 pg.
Read Date: May 16-17, 2022
Support Independent Bookstores - Visit IndieBound.org

What’s The Traitor’s Heir About?

When the book opens, Eamon Goodman, the orphaned son of a bookbinder currently a cadet in the final stages of his training as a member of the army of the Master of the River Realm. He doesn’t seem to be very good at being a soldier but is committed to passing and taking the oath. Beyond that, his heart doesn’t seem to be in it, either—but maybe it’s just the best route for some sort of security for him.

He seems to be a decent guy in an army that doesn’t have a lot of them—although those traits seem to be highly valued. After taking his oath, and achieving more success than seems deserved he meets someone who claims to be a descendant of the true king, deposed some centuries ago. Eamon agrees to work for this King in the capital.

Eamon isn’t the Chosen One—that’s (presumably) the King. However, Eamon is a direct descendant of the last King’s First Knight—champion and advisor. He’s not the Chosen One—he’s more like the Chosen Sidekick. Eamon’s calling seems to be to aid the King to reclaim the throne and serve him.

He goes to the capital and follows the King’s wishes. Until, with the help of a beautiful noblewoman, he gets distracted and serves the Master. Then circumstances lead him back to the King. And then…he ping-pongs between the two until he makes a final choice.

What I Don’t Get…

I’ve run into this issue before, this isn’t me picking on Thayer. The reader is clearly to get invested in this struggle between the King and the Master, we’re supposed to want to see the Master defeated and the King to retake the throne. But…

There is no reason to root for the King and his forces here beyond “generations ago his ancestor lost the throne due to the duplicity of his trusted knight. We have no vision of how he’ll improve anything for anyone but those supporters of his that have to hide their allegiance or have to live in his secret campground. His being on the throne would allow them to live openly and/or in society. Yes, he seems to be kind, compassionate, and honorable, but…there are a lot of good guys who happen to be related to someone who used to be in power that shouldn’t be put back in a position of authority.

There aren’t a lot of reasons for the reader to want to see the downfall of The Master. Sure, he treats those sewing dissension in the populace and/or actively working to bring down his government harshly. But…what government doesn’t? The methods he uses seem extreme and capricious, but also seem like the kind of thing a government in this setting would do.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s clear that The Master is evil, he manipulates Eamon throughout—and anyone who gets “behind the curtain” to see how the government is run should have qualms about it. But John and Jane Smith working away in their village outside the city aren’t being oppressed. They’re not being starved. They’re not being exploited. The same is true for Jill or Joe practicing their trades or selling their wares in the cities.

I can tell you why Panem’s President Snow should be defeated. I can tell you why the Golds should be replaced by the government that Darrow’s revolt made possible. The Sheriff of Nottingham? Oh, absolutely—Robin Hood is in the right. The White Witch and her never-ending (and Christmas-free) Winter need to be overthrown. But I can’t tell you how things are going to be better for the River Realm or its people. That’s really hard for me to push past.

So, what did I think about The Traitor’s Heir?

Thayer has a thinly disguised allegory here—our protagonist is a good man who has sworn an allegiance to an evil master while being given grace by the rightful king, who appeals to him to freely choose to serve this king. Allegories aren’t necessarily supposed to be subtle, but this was just one degree shy of Pilgrim’s Progress-level obviousness. Go for allegory if you want, but unless you’re Bunyan, do something other than use it like a 2×4 in the hands of “Hacksaw” Jim Duggan.

Eamon didn’t struggle between the two who wanted his allegiance. If you think of his allegiance as a number line from -10 to 10, he was wholly devoted to -10 and then swung to the other extreme. Then he’d rush back to -10. He never spent any time at 5, or -5—always the extreme. Show me some wavering. Show him spending some time around 0, teetering in each direction. Give me conflict. All I see is a flake that two antagonists are vying over—for no discernible reason than his status as Chosen Sidekick.

Eamon is a problematic character for me—even without his wavering allegiances. I clearly can’t buy into the political struggle. I’m dissatisfied with the world-building (I had a section detailing it, but deleted it because this post was becoming too negative). This book was headed for the DNF pile…and yet.

And yet…

Thayer kept ensnaring me. I couldn’t stop reading. I wasn’t enjoying anything, didn’t think I was reading a decent book—but I had to know what the next page held. And the next. And the next. Sure, I kept checking the page number so I knew how much longer this would go (and kept wishing the number was closer to 541)—but I’d have to see what 253 held. It makes no sense to me—but Thayer got her hooks in me. Her knack for that means I can’t go lower than 3 (begrudging) stars

So yeah, this was a compelling, if frustrating, read. Your results may vary. I know at least one friend/sometimes reader of this blog will disagree with me (he is, after all, who recommended the book to me). Others are more than welcome—encouraged, even—to weigh in and tell me what I missed. Give this a shot if the idea appeals to you—the trilogy looks like it’ll take a different shape than most. Just that novelty may be enough to intrigue you (it pulls on me).


3 Stars

This post contains an affiliate link. If you purchase from it, I will get a small commission at no additional cost to you. As always, opinions are my own.

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