“A man condemning the income tax because of the annoyance it gives him or the expense it puts him to is merely a dog baring its teeth, and he forfeits the privileges of civilized discourse. But it is permissible to criticize it on other and impersonal grounds. A government, like an individual, spends money for any or all of three reasons: because it needs to, because it wants to, or simply because it has it to spend. The last is much the shabbiest. It is arguable, if not manifest, that a substantial proportion of this great spring flood of billions pouring into the Treasury will in effect get spent for that last shabby reason.”
–Nero Wolfe
Category: Calendar Items Page 18 of 25
So, here’s what happened here in March. It wasn’t a great month — lots of stuff at work distracted me, some sickness, and whatnot threw me off. There were 7 books I didn’t get to that I’d either planned on or committed to read. Neither of which is something I enjoy doing. Hopefully April is all about catching up.
Books/Novels/Novellas Read/Listened to:
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Still Reading:
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Reviews Posted:
- Illinois Native Americans: A 9,000 Year Civilization by in60Learning
- Resurrection Men by Ian Rankin
- Mr. Neutron by Joe Ponepinto
- The Armored Saint by Myke Cole
- Greek Mythology: Beyond Mount Olympus by in60learning
- Nils Cuts His Nails – The Scissors Game by Nurit Zvolon, Rotem Lots-Zaiden
- Madam Tulip and the Bones of Chance by David Ahern
- Don’t Ever Look Behind Door 32 by B.C.R. Fegan, Lenny Wen
- My Little Eye by Stephanie Marland
- Burn Bright by Patricia Briggs
- Magic For Nothing by Seanan McGuire
- Tricks for Free by Seanan McGuire
- Everything is Normal by Sergey Grechishkin
- Skyjack by K. J. Howe
- An Ill-Fated Sky by Darrell Drake
Book Challenge Progress:
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Wires and Nerves, Volume 2: Gone Rogue by Marissa Meyer, Douglas Holgate (link forthcoming) Good Guys by Steve Brust (link forthcoming) |
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Mr. Neutron by Joe Ponepinto Nils Cuts His Nails – The Scissors Game by Nurit Zvolon, Rotem Lots-Zaiden Vernon the Vegetarian Lion by John Hughson, Ali Smith (link forthcoming — I thought I’d written it up by now) Everything is Normal: The Life and Times of a Soviet Kid by Sergey Grechishkin Secular Jewish Culture by Yaakov Malkin, ed. |
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Mr. Neutron by Joe Ponepinto Greek Mythology by Nils Cuts His Nails – The Scissors Game by Nurit Zvolon, Rotem Lots-Zaiden Don’t Ever Look Behind Door 32 by B.C.R. Fegan, Lenny Wen Vernon the Vegetarian Lion by John Hughson, Ali Smith (link forthcoming — I thought I’d written it up by now) Everything is Normal: The Life and Times of a Soviet Kid by Sergey Grechishkin Secular Jewish Culture by Yaakov Malkin, ed. |
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Nothing here . . . whoops. I’ve gotta get moving on this one. |
How was your month?
My numbers should’ve been a little better — but between Iron Gold taking more time than I was prepared for, and ongoing sickness, I got a little behind with reading — and the writing took another hit this month, that I really can’t explain. Oh well. Onward and upward, and all that, right?
Anyway, here’s what happened here in February:
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Still Reading:
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Reviews Posted:
- The Bomb Maker by Thomas Perry
- A Blogger’s Manifesto: A Modern Day Guide to Blogging by Aman Mittal
- Faith: California Scheming by Jody Houser, Pere Pérez, Marguerite Sauvage, Colleen Doran
- Like a Champion by Vincent Chu
- Smoke Eaters by Sean Grigsby
- The Fed-up Cow by Peta Lemon, Maria Dasic Todoric
- Iron Gold by Pierce Brown
- Uber Diva by Charles St. Anthony
- The Meifod Claw by JW Bowe
- Golden Gremlin by Rod A. Walters
- The Strange Death of Fiona Griffiths by Harry Bingham
- Timekeepers by Simon Garfield
- Blood Binds the Pack by Alex Wells
Book Challenge Progress:
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Iron Gold by Pierce Brown Brighton Beach Memoirs by Neil Simon, Max Casella, Peter Michael Goetz, Valerie Harper, Alexana Lambros, Anna Sophie Loewenberg, Jonathan Silverman, Joyce Van Patten The Late Show by Michael Connelly, Katherine Moennig Resurrection Men by Ian Rankin (link forthcoming) |
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Like a Champion by Vincent Chu Golden Gremlin by Rod A. Walters A Blogger’s Manifesto: A Modern Day Guide to Blogging by Aman Mittal Uber Diva by Charles St. Anthony Smoke Eaters The Fed-up Cow by Peta Lemon, Maria Dasic Todori The Meifod Claw by JW Bowe Timekeepers by Simon Garfield Illinois Native Americans by in60Learning.com |
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Like a Champion by Vincent Chu Golden Gremlin by Rod A. Walters A Blogger’s Manifesto: A Modern Day Guide to Blogging by Aman Mittal Uber Diva by Charles St. Anthony The Fed-up Cow by Peta Lemon, Maria Dasic Todori The Meifod Claw by JW Bowe Illinois Native Americans by in60Learning.com Smoke Eaters by Sean Grigsby Timekeepers by Simon Garfield |
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Whoops. Nothing this month! |
How was your month?
My numbers aren’t as strong as I hoped to kick off this year, particularly the writing. I honestly don’t understand why it’s so low — on the plus side, I’ve slept more lately than usual (unscheduled sleep, mostly, but that’s beside the point). Still, plenty of entertaining reads, which is the important thing.
Anyway, on to the more interesting stuff…Here’s what happened here in January.
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Still Reading:
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The few books I’ve managed to post about:
- The Questionable Behavior of Dahlia Moss by Max Wirestone
- Didn’t Get Frazzled by David Z. Hirsch, MD
- Operation: Endgame by Pip Ballantine and Tee Morris
- Love Story, With Murders by Harry Bingham
- All Those Explosions Were Someone Else’s Fault by James Alan Gardner
- Laughing Eyes by Haya Magner, Miri Leshem Peli
- Beneath the Sugar Sky by Seanan McGuire
- Where Night Stops by Douglas Light
- The Falls by Ian Rankin
- Orphan X by Gregg Hurwitz
- The Unbelievable Story of How I Met Your Mother by Preston Randall
- Profane Fire at the Altar of the Lord by Dennis Malley
- The Dying Place by Luca Veste
- Silence (Audiobook) by Thomas Perry, Michael Kramer
Book Challenge Progress:
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Simple Genius by David Baldacci, Scott Brick All Those Explosions Were Someone Else’s Fault by James Alan Gardner Paddle Your Own Canoe: One Man’s Fundamentals for Delicious Living by Nick Offerman The Falls by Ian Rankin Orphan X by Gregg Hurwitz The Bomb Maker by Thomas Perry (link to come) |
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Laughing Eyes by Haya Magner, Miri Leshem Peli Where Night Stops by Douglas Light The Unbelievable Story of How I Met Your Mother by Preston Randall Profane Fire at the Altar of the Lord by Dennis Malley All Those Explosions Were Someone Else’s Fault by James Alan Gardner Paddle Your Own Canoe: One Man’s Fundamentals for Delicious Living by Nick Offerman God without Passions A Primer: A Practical and Pastoral Study of Divine Impassibility by Samuel Renihan Orphan X by Gregg Hurwitz Silence (Audiobook) by Thomas Perry, Michael Kramer |
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Laughing Eyes by Haya Magner, Miri Leshem Peli Where Night Stops by Douglas Light The Unbelievable Story of How I Met Your Mother by Preston Randall Profane Fire at the Altar of the Lord by Dennis Malley Operation: Endgame by Pip Ballantine and Tee Morris |
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✔ Read a self published book: Profane Fire at the Altar of the Lord by Dennis Malley |
How was your month?
As we kick off 2018, I wanted to take a glance back at 2017. 260 books read — I exceeded my goal (nothing like exceeding an arbitrary number to boost the ol’ ego), 395 posts (short of my goal by a couple hundred, and worse — almost 50 fewer than 2015!). I had some strong gains in traffic — views and visitors — and I’m also seeing good growth in followers here and on various social media fronts, which is encouraging as all get out.
So here’s my breakdown of books by genre, like the one I did last year. Genre labeling is more difficult this year, I read a lot of hybrids, but I tend to go with the overarching genre (for example, Artemis is a SF and Crime hybrid, I went with SF). Mystery/Suspense/Thriller is back to where it should be. SF and Fantasy took the hit to make up for that. it’s been forever since I’ve read a Western, I guess (at least one that wasn’t a hybrid with Urban Fantasy or SF or something). Theological books went down in actual numbers, not just percent — but I read some big, technical stuff this year that took a lot more time/energy to read, so I’m not too bothered by that. Still, for someone who doesn’t plan too thoroughly, the percentages stay remarkably the same from year to year — tastes (and series I follow) apparently stay the same.
| Genre | 2017 | 2016 | 2015 | 2014 | 2013 | 2012 |
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| Children’s | 7 (3%) | 5 (2%) | 0 (0%) | 0 (0%) | 0 (0%) | 0 (0%) |
| Fantasy | 7 (3%) | 31 (13%) | 17 (9%) | 11 (7%) | 15 (8%) | 12 (6%) |
| General Fiction/ Literature |
29 (10%) | 27 (11%) | 17 (9%) | 7 (4%) | 30 (16%) | 30 (14%) |
| Horror | 0 (0%) | 1 (.4%) | 0 (0%) | 0 (0%) | 0 (0%) | 0 (0%) |
| Humor | 1 (0%) | 0 (0%) | 1 (1%) | 3 (2%) | 0 (0%) | 0 (0%) |
| Mystery/ Suspense/ Thriller |
102 (37%) | 61 (25%) | 64 (34%) | 62 (37%) | 63 (33%) | 73 (35%) |
| Non-Fiction | 10 (4%) | 11 (5%) | 8 (4%) | 4 (2%) | 2 (1%) | 11 (5%) |
| Science Fiction | 27 (10%) | 37 (15%) | 16 (8%) | 17 (10%) | 14 (7%) | 11 (5%) |
| Steampunk | 1 (0%) | 2 (1%) | 7 (4%) | 3 (2%) | 3 (2%) | 11 (5%) |
| Theology/ Christian Living |
30 (11%) | 33 (14%) | 42 (22%) | 42 (25%) | 37 (19%) | 10 (5%) |
| Urban Fantasy | 45 (16%) | 36 (15%) | 19 (10%) | 20 (12%) | 26 (14%) | 48 (23%) |
| Western | 0 (0%) | 0 (0%) | 0 (0%) | 0 (0%) | 0 (0%) | 1 (0%) |
- Enough about me. I want to talk about you, who keep me going and show an interest in what I’m doing here and give some thanks to people for their impact on The Irresponsible Reader (the blog and the person) in 2017:
- Thanks to everyone for your comments/feedback — texts, emails, comments here/BookLikes/Goodreads, tweets, FB comments, even the occasional Face-to-Face conversation. Keep it up! I really appreciate the time you took to leave feedback. Hopefully you can tell that you’ve shaped the conversation here — it has, I assure you.
- Flattered thanks to (in no particular order): vihasi shah, ravencrimereads , JL’s Bibliomania, littlemissnosleep, charmingkitties, hubblegal, bettybookreviews, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, BOOK BLOG, tripleblacktri, SnoopyDoo, discobarbizar, iosappdevelopmentcompanyinbangaloreblog, dawgietime, ellabyrde, QuietBlogster, amandanicolette, pandaduh, GEORGE SORIN VENETE, The Sound of One Man Laughing, catskittiesandmore, saisuresh007, perfectbingosites.co.uk, alexankarr1, mysteryauthorjamesrnelson, Abinotronix, martyn james, Jeyran Main, J. A. Allen, passmethatbook, Tannat, roamingwanderlusts, nzfnmblog and writerlady, Adam Harkus (a blog my two young guitarists will love), Christy Luis, kirilson, Let’s Read Something New, publishquest2017, Genre Book Reviews, gencyazarlarklubu, Reading is My Escapte, Portable Magic, Mollie Player, netbij, Scarlett Brodie, Maria Bardyukova, bloggerfingers, MladenR, Anushka, annebonnybookreviews, thehuntandpeckblog, Richard Klu, The Cable Denning Fan Club, Mr and Mrs NW, abokrose, LizScanlon, theartdive, M.L.S.Weech, Simple Ula, Skulls and Coffee, BellaDonna, vickibrock44, Rizky FAUZI, whatsnonfiction, Reasons To Resist, nishlovepink, foodlove16, Scarletpiper, georgederringer, youngadultallegiance, The Lyrictrotter, shellinoutreviews, Nici Copywriter, Fangirl Moments and My Two Cents, Mrinalini Raj, Shelfleigh, Shaun Hume, dreamnoiseblog, Alice @ Arctic Books, thrillersuspense, texaslawstudent, Lauren, Author Maremma Gee, Person of Interest, Brusque and The Hunt and Peck Blog for being new followers (at least for a post or two) of the blog (in one of its forms) this year — the size of this list shocks me, and I hope you all got at least something out of it. (I sincerely hope I didn’t miss anyone)
- Hearty thanks to (in no particular order): Rosaria Butterfield, R. David Cox, Miles V. Van Pelt, D. I. Jolly, Alex Wells, Matthew Barrett, Jim Butcher, Kerrie L. Hughes, Carrie Vaughn, Patricia Murphy, Brad Parks, Sam Lawrence & Ben Jackson, Danko Herrera, Taylor Stevens, Hillary Huber, Andy Martin, Zoe Kalo, Gibson Michaels, Ian Rankin, Sinclair B. Ferguson, Jennifer Weiner, John Bowen, J. B. Rockwell, K. S. Villoso, Aimee Byrd, Luca Veste, Paul Goldstein, Max Elliot Anderson, Brandon D. Crowe, Sarah Pinborough, Duncan MacMaster, Marissa Meyer, Douglas Holgate, Danielle Rogland, Faith Hunter, Lloyd Alexander, James Langton, Bryan Lee O’Malley, Leslie Hung, Derek Landy, Rupert Degas, Lee Child, Dick Hill, Shawn Hartje, Ace Atkins, Seanan McGuire, J. Gresham Machen, Alan Bradley, Jayne Entwistle, Christopher Hansen, J.R. Fehr, Loren D. Estleman, Owen Laukkanen, Reformed Forum, John Scalzi, Samuel G. Sterling, Danielle Pollock, Joshua Torrey, W. Robert Godfrey, Carolyn Arnold, Steph Broadribb, Sarah Kuhn, Dave Barry, Patrick Frederic, Benedict Jacka, D.J. Bodden, Mindy Kaling, Geehardus Vos, Sam Allberry, Graeme Simsion, Josh Bazell, Robert Petkoff, Rob Shackleford, Chrys Cymri, Jason Miller, Stephen Oram, Steve Cavanagh, David Baldacci, Scott Brick, Doree Shafrir, Paul Cornell, O. Palmer Robertson, Paul W. Cohen, Rick Riordan, Kieran Culkin, Robbie DaymondRobbie Daymond, Steve Hamilton, Spencer Quinn, Jason Parent, Amber Benson,E.J. Copperman, Jeff Cohen, Zoë Sharp, Alex Bledsoe, Patrick Ness, Ash Gray, Craig Johnson, George Guidall, Cory Barclay, Stephen Wellum, Stephan Pastis, Jared Goldsmith, Emily Ruben, Ryan McGraw, Michael J. Kruger, J. Ligon Duncan, Russ Colchamiro, George Bachman, Stephen Clark, Mark Jones, Don Winslow, Patricia Briggs, Lorelei King, Holter Graham, Gabe Hudson, Reed Farrel Coleman, Jacqueline Chadwick, Robert Germaux, Bradley Horner, B.C.R. Fegan, Lenny Wen, Chris Grabenstein, Jeff Woodman, Michael Connelly, Nathaniel Barber, Rachel Isgar, Ph.D., Cornelis P. Venema, Ben Sasse, Angie Thomas, Bahni Turpin, Chrissy Lessey, M. T. Miller, Shaun Hume, Jo Perry, Layton Green, Jason Reynolds, Guy Lockard, Alex BehrAlex Behr, Hart Hanson, Ari Fliakos, Joseph Brassey, Amy Stewart, Adam Sternberg, David Rosenfelt, Grover Gardner, Josef Matulich, Matt Cowper, C. J. Williams, Lucy Treloar, Kristin I. Morris, Joseph J. Zielinski, Ph.D., L.G. Metcalf, O.Hallesby, Leigh Bardugo, Mozhan Marno, Michael RN Jones, John Calvin, Joe Ide, Mindy M. Shelton, Tia Sorenson, Daniel Falatko, Robin Sloan, Rich Leder, Brian Cosby, Michael Allen, Scott R. Swain, Alan Jacobs, David Yair, ilana Graf, Natalie Jackson, Krysten Ritter, Carl R. Trueman, Katrina Shawver, S. J. Rozan, James E. Dolezal, Jonathan Fesmire, Dan Sofer, Edgar Cantero, Kyla Garcia, Doogie Horner, JJ Harrison, Sue Grafton, Joe Zieja, Tehila Sade Moyal, Fatima Pires, Hugh Martin, K. J. Howe, Peter Clines, Alejandro de Gutierre, S.C. Flynn, Alan Sepinwall, Andy Weir, Susan E. Davis, PT, Howard L. Hibbard, Robert Crais MacLeod Andrews, Robert Kolb, Harry Bingham, Siriol Jenkins, Kevin Hearne, Luke Daniels, Shane Kuhn, Pete Simonelli, Joel Beeke, Heather L. Beal, Jubayda Sager, Isaac Alexis, MD, Max McBride, Janet Evanovich, Peter May, Harry Connolly, Max Wirestone, Ned Vizzini, Robert Fass, John Murray, Ben Aaronovitch, Kobna Holdbrook-Smith, Andrew Cartmel, Lee Sullivan, Luis Guerrero, David Z. Hirsch, Robert B. Parker, Michael Prichard, Neil Gaiman, Maria Bardyukova, Quiet Riley, Jr., Rik Hoskin, and (last but certainly not least) Tom Garcia this blog would be nothing without your efforts, your blood, sweat, tears, fears, work, love, dreams, hopes, and words. Your books were my companions throughout this year, and I can’t thank you enough for them (and I hope I get to spend time with many of you again soon!).
- More thanks to all those who requested that I read and talk about your (or your clients’) books. I know how much the work, effort, heart, and everything that went into your books. It’s super humbling, I know you all didn’t like what I said, but, I am grateful for the opportunity. Sorry, I didn’t list you all by name this year, my records got a little confusing.
- Many thanks to Faith Hunter, Nathaniel Barber, B.C.R. Fegan, Russ Colchamiro, Duncan MacMaster, Ben Jackson, and D.I. Jolly for taking time out of your busy schedules to answer a few quick questions with me this year!
- Thanks to Alex Behr who sent me a very attractive looking signed paperback copy of Planet Grim a couple of weeks ago, and I keep forgetting to send a thank you to. So, while I’m hitting everyone else up here…
- A shout-out to my wife (inside joke). Seriously, dear, without your support, indulgence and patience this thing wouldn’t exist — and I’d read a lot less (the horror!). Thank you. I love you.
- And thank you all for reading. Seriously, each time I get a notification of a like, or a share, or a follow, etc. it makes my day. To know that someone took a couple of seconds or more out of their day to glance at this? It means the world to me. Thanks.
Have a great 2018, hope you find plenty of good things to read!
So, here’s what happened here in December, 2017. Good way (generally speaking) to end the year! (I’ll get to the 2017 as a whole thing later today, I hope)
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Still Reading:
Nothin’, nada, zip, zilch . . . been awhile since I’ve done that!
Reviews Posted:
- Bedlam by M. T. Miller
- Death is Not the End by Ian Rankin
- The Squirrel on the Train (Audiobook) by Kevin Hearne, Luke Daniels
- Red Dog by Jason Miller
- Briefly Maiden by Jacqueline Chadwick
- The Cult of Unicorns by Chrys Cymri
- Closer Than You Know by Brad Park
- Life and Death Behind the Brick and Razor: Code Red Diamond by Isaac Alexis, MD
- Tummy Rumble Quake by Heather L. Beal, Jubayda Sager
- Elephant Wind by Heather L. Beal, Jubayda Sager
- Mink Eyes by Max McBride
- Snobbity Snowman by Maria Bardyukova & Quiet Riley, Jr.
- The Twisted Path by Harry Connolly
- Turbo Twenty-Three by Janet Evanovich
- Set in Darkness by Ian Rankin
- The Blackhouse by Peter May
- The Crossing by Michael Connelly
- The Wanted by Robert Crais
How was your month?
I had a pretty good month, it seems. I gave out a whole lot of 4 Stars — which means I read/talked about a whole lot of good books. Good way to spend the penultimate month of 2017.
Here’s what happened here in November.
Books/Novels/Novellas Read/Listened to:
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Still Reading:
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Reviews Posted:
- Y is for Yesterday by Sue Grafton
- Moshe Comes to Visit by Tehila Sade Moyal, Fatima Pires
- The Squirrel on the Train by Kevin Hearne
- Grace Alone–Salvation as a Gift of God by Carl R. Trueman
- Communication Failure by Joe Zieja
- Bodacious Creed by Jonathan Fesmire
- Righteous by Joe Ide
- The Rat Tunnels of Isfahan by Alejandro de Gutierre
- Meddling Kids (Audiobook) by Edgar Cantero, Kyla Garcia
- The Freedom Broker by K. J. Howe
- Breaking Bad 101 by Alan Sepinwall
- Paradox Bound by Peter Clines
- Dead Souls by Ian Rankin
- All Hands on Pet! by Susan E. Davis, PT
- Artemis by Andy Weir
- Flame in the Dark by Faith Hunter
- The Hidden Face by S. C. Flynn
- The Midnight Line by Lee Child
- Curse of the Coloring Book by Howard L. Hibbard
- Deep Blue Trouble by Steph Broadribb
How was your month?
Happy Thanksgiving/Turkey Day/Thursday
(depending on your location/preference)
When I think about all the great things that have happened around the blog and behind the scenes this year leaves me at a loss for words, let me list a few things I’m thankful for — a very incomplete list, I assure you:
- The readers of this blog, the authors who’ve corresponded with me/provided books for me to read/encouraged me — even promoted this here project (seriously, Nathaniel Barber and Darrell Drake have done almost as much to advertise my work as I have). There are publicists, publishers, etc. I’ve been working with this year who’ve especially made things great — I’d mention some of you by name, but I’d inadvertently miss one I meant to include and would feel horrible and cause offense.
- Books
- Authors!
- Books
- Coffee (and other beverages both caffeinated and adult)
- Books
- Time to read
- Books
- Easily finding an appropriate image for this post for a change
- Audiobooks and talented narrators
- The Nampa Public Library (and The LYNX! Consortium) — and their generous grace period
- Books
- Goodreads, WordPress, NetGalley, BookLikes
- Books
- Evernote
- Books
- Authors!
- Authors!
- Again, all of you who read, follow, like, tweet, comment, email, etc. this page — you have no idea how much every little bit is appreciated.
My supportive, understanding and encouraging wife and kids who do a pretty decent job pretending to care when their old man drones on and on about what he’s reading.
October’s been a frustrating month for me, and I’m glad to put it behind me. Almost everything took a day or more longer than I thought it would to read, I had a hard time writing a few posts (don’t ask me why), and like I mentioned yesterday, I got knocked out by a stupid cold for a few days. On the other hand, looking back at this post, I read some pretty cool books — and when I can focus on that, this is a pretty fun hobby. And If I can accomplish most of what I want to in November, this’ll be a much happier post next month.
But enough of that, here’s what happened here in October.
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DNF:
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Still Reading:
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Reviews Posted:
- The Hunger Angels by Jason Miller
- McCall & Company: Workman’s Complication by Rich Leder
- The Flying Frog and the Kidnappers by David Yair, ilana Graf, Natalie Jackson
- How to Think by Alan Jacobs
- A Long Day in Lychford by Paul Cornell
- Planet Grim by Alex Behr
- Bonfire by Krysten Ritter
- Open and Shut (Audiobook) by David Rosenfelt, Grover Gardner
- Tilt-a-Whirl (Audiobook) by Chris Grabenstein, Jeff Woodman
- Henry by Katrina Shawver
- Ghost Hero by S. J. Rozan
- The Dark Prophecy by Rick Riordan, Robbie Daymond
- An Unexpected Afterlife by Dan Sofer
- The Hanging Garden by Ian Rankin
- A Die Hard Christmas by Doogie Horner, JJ Harrison
How was your month?
My annual tribute to one of my favorite fictional characters (if not my all-time favorite).
On Oct 23 in Chillicothe, Ohio, Archie Goodwin entered this world–no doubt with a smile for the pretty nurses–and American detective literature was never the same.
I’m toasting him in one of the ways I think he’d appreciate most–by raising a glass of milk in his honor.
Who was Archie? Archie summed up his life thusly:
Born in Ohio. Public high school, pretty good at geometry and football, graduated with honor but no honors. Went to college two weeks, decided it was childish, came to New York and got a job guarding a pier, shot and killed two men and was fired, was recommended to Nero Wolfe for a chore he wanted done, did it, was offered a full-time job by Mr. Wolfe, took it, still have it.” (Fourth of July Picnic)
Long may he keep it. Just what was he employed by Wolfe to do? In The Black Mountain he answers the statement, “I thought you was a private eye” with:
I don’t like the way you say it, but I am. Also I am an accountant, an amanuensis, and a cocklebur. Eight to five you never heard the word amanuensis and you never saw a cocklebur.
In The Red Box, he says
I know pretty well what my field is. Aside from my primary function as the thorn in the seat of Wolfe’s chair to keep him from going to sleep and waking up only for meals, I’m chiefly cut out for two things: to jump and grab something before the other guy can get his paws on it, and to collect pieces of the puzzle for Wolfe to work on.
In Black Orchids, he reacts to an insult:
…her cheap crack about me being a ten-cent Clark Gable, which was ridiculous. He simpers, to begin with, and to end with no one can say I resemble a movie actor, and if they did it would be more apt to be Gary Cooper than Clark Gable.
I’m not the only Archie fan out there:
- A few months back, someone pointed me at this post, The Wit and Wisdom of Archie Goodwin. There’s some really good stuff here that I was tempted to steal, instead, I’ll just point you at it.
- Robert Crais himself when writing an introduction to a Before Midnight reprint, devoted it to paying tribute to Archie. — one of the few pieces of anything written that I can say I agree with jot and tittle.
In case you’re wondering if this post was simply an excuse to go through some collections of Archie Goodwin quotations, you wouldn’t be totally wrong…he’s one of the fictional characters I like spending time with most in this world–he’s the literary equivalent of comfort food. So just a couple more great lines I’ve quoted here before:
I would appreciate it if they would call a halt on all their devoted efforts to find a way to abolish war or eliminate disease or run trains with atoms or extend the span of human life to a couple of centuries, and everybody concentrate for a while on how to wake me up in the morning without my resenting it. It may be that a bevy of beautiful maidens in pure silk yellow very sheer gowns, barefooted, singing “Oh, What a Beautiful Morning” and scattering rose petals over me would do the trick, but I’d have to try it.
I looked at the wall clock. It said two minutes to four. I looked at my wrist watch. It said one minute to four. In spite of the discrepancy it seemed safe to conclude that it would soon be four o’clock.
She turned back to me, graceful as a big cat, and stood there straight and proud, not quite smiling, her warm dark eyes as curious as if she had never seen a man before. I knew damn well I ought to say something, but what? The only thing to say was ‘Will you marry me?’ but that wouldn’t do because the idea of her washing dishes or darning socks was preposterous.)
“Indeed,” I said. That was Nero Wolfe’s word, and I never used it except in moments of stress, and it severely annoyed me when I caught myself using it, because when I look in a mirror I prefer to see me as is, with no skin grafted from anybody else’s hide, even Nero Wolfe’s.
If you like Anglo-Saxon, I belched. If you fancy Latin, I eructed. No matter which, I had known that Wolfe and Inspector Cramer would have to put up with it that evening, because that is always a part of my reaction to sauerkraut. I don’t glory in it or go for a record, but neither do I fight it back. I want to be liked just for myself.
When a hippopotamus is peevish it’s a lot of peeve.
It helps a lot, with two people as much together as he and I were, if they understand each other. He understood that I was too strong-minded to add another word unless he told me to, and I understood that he was too pigheaded to tell me to.
I always belong wherever I am.