Category: Humor Page 2 of 7

Grammar Sex and Other Stuff: A Collection of (mostly humorous) Essays by Robert Germaux: A Collection That (mostly) Amused Me

DETAILS:
Series: Grammar Sex Collection, #1
Publication Date: February 19, 2017
Format: eBook
Length: 82 pg.
Read Date: June 22-25, 2024

Research shows, and here I’m talking my made- up research, but I’m sure actual research would back me up on this . . . anyway, research, real or otherwise, indicates that once you’ve grabbed your readers’ attention (by, for example, throwing the word sex into your title), the best way to keep them turning those pages is to present them with prose so superbly written, so free of errors in spelling and punctuation and syntax, that they simply lose themselves in your wonderful narrative.

What’s Grammar Sex and Other Stuff About?

Well, that’s in the subtitle—it’s A Collection of (mostly humorous) Essays. The word “brief” is the only thing missing from the title—there are 32 of them and the book is 82 pages long, so none of them are all that long.

The title itself comes from the sixth essay, “Grammar Sex (How Dangling Your Participle Can Hurt Your Book Sales),” a fun list of tips for authors—aspiring or otherwise—when it comes to learning how to use language. That’s not all he has to say about grammar, either, a little later we’re treated to a series called “The Grammar Snobs Trilogy”—a combination of useful tips and some silliness (neither of which interfere with the other).

We also get essays about the brief experience he and his wife had as being an Arbitron family, Jury Duty, baseball (and the money behind it), a dog he bought in college, some semi-random observations, and more.

If You’d Like a Sample

Germaux has provided a few guest posts here over the years, in case you’d like to take a quick look at his work. One of those happens to be an essay from this book, so you can get an actual sample of this book—”Literally? Really?” popped up on this site back in 2016(!). It’s a good way to catch a little flavor of this collection—and just a decent read in general. You might as well read the others, while you’re at it (if you haven’t already—and/or could use a refresher)

So, what did I think about Grammar Sex and Other Stuff?

The non-humorous essays weren’t my favorite—they were a little too generic, a little too…something. They were heartfelt for sure, and I don’t want to take away from that. But they didn’t do much for me, it seemed like Germaux was restraining himself in one way or another so he could make a point, and I don’t think the price was worth the result.

The rest were well worth the (short) time it took to read—and probably worth more than the time. I’m not going to promise you that you’re going to laugh out loud on every page—or even in every humorous essay. But you’ll find enough amusing to keep going.

A couple of months ago, I described the humor of a Patrick McManus book as “gentle.” That’s a good word to describe this humor, too. However, there’s a little oomph to Germaux’s humor that McManus doesn’t really have—I attribute that to the clear influence of Dave Barry on Germaux. He doesn’t rip off Barry’s style or anything (and I should know, I used to do that a lot), but even beyond mentioning Barry a time or three, you can tell that Germaux has read his share of the Floridian humorist.

I had a good time with this collection, and am more than ready to try the next in the series (and not just because I accidentally purchased it when I tried to get this one). I do recommend this for some pleasant and mostly humorous reading time.

3 Stars

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REPOSTING JUST CUZ: E.B. White on Dogs edited by Martha White: A Great Collection of Short Pieces

By HCNewton

On July 11, 2024

In Dogs, Humor, Non-Fiction

The Post I have been trying to finish since Monday morning remains undone (I got sooo close today). But I feel the need to post something just to confirm to myself that, yes, I do have a blog. So, here we go, in honor of the 126th anniversary of his birth, why not look at this collection of writings from Elwyn Brooks White.

E. B. White on Dogs

edited by Martha White

DETAILS:
Publisher: Tilbury House Publishers
Publication Date: March 7, 2016
Format: Paperback
Length: 177 pg.
Read Date: December 28-31, 2022

Next year, when Dog Show time comes round, we would like to see a wholly new brand of showmanship introduced into the Garden… A dog should be made to work for his ribbon, each breed in his own wise. Pointers should have to point, Shepherds should be required to herd a band of sheep from the east goal to the west goal. Poodles should be required to jump through a paper hoop, not just follow Mrs. Sherman Hoyt around the ring. English bull terriers should be made to count up to ten, retrievers retrieve rubber ducks, Scotties chew up old shoes. Greyhounds should be put over the high hurdles. St. Bernards carry brandy to anyone in the audience who feels weak, preferably us. Beagles would jolly well have to bealge, or shut up. How about it, dogs—are you dogs or mice?

What’s E. B. White on Dogs About?

This is a collection of essays, articles, letters, and other brief notes written by E.B. White about dogs. In other words, it’s what the title says. Most of the entries are very short—1-2 pages, some are a paragraph long—but (especially toward the end), we get some longer letters and essays.

Most are about White’s dogs—particularly Fred, a beloved dachshund. But there are pieces about dog shows and other dogs, too.

A Few Highlights

This is going to be tough, there are just too many options. Something about Dog Shows brought out the best and/or snarkiest in White, and are possibly my favorite moments.

There’s a point where he describes how a dachshund climbs up and down stairs and the optimum height for said stairs. I don’t know about the height, but he described perfectly how our pug uses the stairs and it’s something I’m going to borrow. He had, over the course of his life, multiple dachshunds and his affection for the breed is evident. But you can tell that Fred had a big impact on White—both during and after his death. The piece White wrote after his death is possibly the highlight of the book.

There’s a long (for this book, anyway) piece about taking a dog on its first coon hunting trip—it’s just wonderful. It’s tonally different from most of the book, which probably helps it stand out—but it didn’t need much help.

Some Non-Dog Moments

Not everything in this book is focused on dogs but involves them tangentially. The best of these pieces are about contemporary politics—I knew some of the names, but not all of them, but that didn’t change things really.

There’s an essay from The New Yorker that I’d probably have paid half the purchase price of the book for—it’s called “Khrushchev and I (A Study in Similarities).” Some newspaper published a feature on the Soviet premier, and from what I can tell, it was the puffiest puff piece around. White takes some parts of that feature to show how much he and Khrushchev are alike—they’re devoted to their families, like walking in the woods, and so on. The last paragraph points out some important differences, too—size, amount of hair left on their heads, the fact that White has never threatened to bury America…the usual differences. And just as he has you chuckling in a different way than he has for a few pages, the last line or two are somber and sober. Fantastic stuff.

So, what did I think about E. B. White on Dogs?

Overall, this was a great collection. It does feel like Martha White hit “Ctrl-F” on an electronic version of everything her grandfather had written and pasted the entire contents of that search into this book. Some of the letters contain one sentence about a dog—not always that cleverly written or interesting—and I had to wonder why she bothered, outside of a drive for thoroughness.

I don’t recommend reading too much of this at once—but maybe that’s just me, my attention waned after too many entries. But if you’re familiar with White’s non-children’s writing, or have the desire to be, and enjoy reading about dogs (and a couple of cats, and a squirrel or two)—you’ll enjoy this.

Speaking of his non-children’s writing—in her note to the reader describing the impetus for the book, and their approach to editing, keeping the pieces “largely as they appeared originally, not attempting to mesh the inconsistencies.” (including some phrasing I don’t think you’d get away with today). Martha White says,

The letters…are more casual in style and my Tillbury House editor was surprised to find that the co-author of The Elements of Style did not always get his that and which correct, especially in the early years. Our hands-off policy nearly killed her.

I feel for that editor and can’t help but chuckle about E.B. White’s divergence from his own book.

All in all, this book delivers what the title promises, and if that’s up your alley, you’ll enjoy it. I sure did.

4 Stars
This post contains an affiliate link. If you purchase from it, I will get a small commission at no additional cost to you. As always, the opinions expressed are my own.
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The Good Samaritan Strikes Again by Patrick F. McManus: Gentle Humor about Idaho Life

By HCNewton

On May 28, 2024

In Humor, Non-Fiction

The Good Samaritan Strikes Again

by Patrick F. McManus

DETAILS:
Publisher: Holt Paperbacks
Publication Date: August 15, 1993
Format: Paperback
Length: 211 pg.
Read Date: May 8-17, 2024

Over half a century of poking around the woods and mountains, I have rescued several dozen wild creatures from life-threatening situations. Almost none ever expressed an iota of gratitude. Instead, they have attempted to bite me, peck me, claw me, scratch me, gore me, even as | rendered them the service. The only one to repay the favor of my rescuing it was a skunk, when I was eight years old, and it spent all of its resources to purchase my freedom from school for a whole week. In my experience, however, that skunk was unique among wild creatures for its kindness and generosity.

What’s The Good Samaritan Strikes Again About?

This is a collection of 24 of McManus’s essays, pulled from a variety of sources talking about…well, mostly the things he always talks about—his life, hunting, fishing, and things he finds interesting.

There’s not a recurring theme or anything, I’m guessing this is just a collection of pieces written in the early 1990s (the previous collection was published in ’91, the following in ’94).

McManus’s Humor

I think the best way to describe this humor is gentle. He’s not one for clever wordplay (although he will occasionally indulge), this isn’t biting satire, he’s not as outlandish and goofy as Barry. It felt like Lewis Grizzard at half-volume—I think it’s similar to Garrison Keillor (although I really can’t say) or Tom Bodett.

I can’t imagine you’ll guffaw—or laugh out loud. But you’ll be amused. You’ll smile—maybe even chuckle.

So, what did I think about The Good Samaritan Strikes Again?

I haven’t read McManus since the mid-80s—there were a couple of years where some of his early collections were in heavy rotation amongst my extended family and I sampled a few. Mostly I didn’t get his humor at the time—even then I didn’t relate too much to the hunting and fishing jokes. I understood more of them now, at least—but I don’t know that I found them more amusing now.

I feel like I need to turn in my Idaho Citizen card for saying that kind of thing—McManus and I were born in the same city, we were inculcated with many of the same values, and had the same kind of environment growing up. But our senses of humor didn’t develop along the same lines.

The pieces that had the least to do with outdoors-y topics worked best for me. He touches on aging and worry, there’s a little bit of satire relating to PR, there’s some stuff on coping with stress, recounting his first kiss…the title essay involves trying to help a motorist following an accident. Then there are a lot of things involving camping, hiking, fishing, hunting and the like…most of those had something I found amusing—a paragraph, a clever sentence—many of them were largely entertaining. But that’s for me—and humor is more subjective than most things I talk about here (although everything is pretty subjective here)—so who knows how you’ll react.

When Ford Prefect’s editors were done with his revisions to the entry for Earth in The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, the entry summing up our planet read “Mostly harmless.” Similarly, I think The Good Samaritan Strikes Again could be summed up as: Mildly amusing.

Your results may vary, obviously, but it’s a pleasant way to spend some time—not much more. But honestly, who wouldn’t mind a pleasant couple of hours?

This post contains an affiliate link. If you purchase from it, I will get a small commission at no additional cost to you. As always, the opinions expressed are my own.
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Great Minds on Small Things by Matthew Qvortrup: Philosophers Addressing Ordinary Life

By HCNewton

On April 23, 2024

In History, Humor, Non-Fiction

Great Minds on Small Things:
The Philosophers’ Guide to Everyday Life

by Matthew Qvortrup

DETAILS:
Publisher: Duckworth Books
Publication Date: October 5, 2023
Format: eARC
Length: 224 pg.
Read Date: March 21-29, 2024

What’s Great Minds on Small Things About?

In 1764, Voltaire published Dictionnaire philosophique. In 1957, Roland Barthes published Mythologies. In 1987, Quiddities: An Intermittently Philosophical Dictionary was published by W. V. Quine. Taking a little something from all of these (and others), in 2023, Matthew Qvortrup brought us Great Minds on Small Things: The Philosophers’ Guide to Everyday Life.

This is a (brief) survey of what philosophers from Plato to George Santayana, and several points between (and a little spillover on either side) have to say about topics that aren’t usually thought of as subjects of philosophical meditation. More like things discussed over beers with coworkers and friends, pontificated on by stand-up comics, or things that people mutter about on social media between photos of sandwiches or cats.

Rather than the meaning of life, the source of ethics, the nature of the will, or social contracts, Qvortrup collects thoughts on things like artichokes, smoking, hiccups, sports, sports, and more sports. Told with a little bit of humor and a clear familiarity with the thinkers and writers he’s covering and quoting, Qvortrup’s survey is both entertaining and educational.

The Breadth of Topics

Qvortrup hits on so many things–here’s a (very non-exhaustive) list that I compiled to give you a taste (the categories are mine, Qvortrup lists things alphabetically). The things I didn’t jot down are just as varied and strange, let me add.

Food/Drink
bullet

Artichoke

Beer

Breakfast

Cheese

Coffee

Quiche

Radishes

Tea

Tomato Juice
bullet

Wine

Inventions
bullet Boilers
bullet Cars
bullet Ships
bullet Telephone

Pets
bullet Cats
bullet Dogs

Activities
bullet Baseball
bullet Basketball
bullet Dancing
bullet Football*
bullet Being Lazy
bullet Marriage
bullet Smoking
bullet Sneezing
bullet Tennis
bullet Wrestling

Human Bodies
bullet Excrement
bullet Farting
bullet Hiccups
bullet Laughter
bullet Penis
bullet Ticklishness
bullet Urination
bullet Winking
bullet Wiping (no, really)
bullet Yawning

* Sorry, Americans, he means “soccer.”

And, sure, while this is about everyday things, Qvortrup does interact with some of the deeper thinkers in (mostly Western) history, and does end up brushing up against some of their deeper thoughts and categories–so, he includes a glossary to help readers like me get through it all.

One Problem with the Tone

Yes, I enjoy writers mixing humor (mild or otherwise) with deeper or controversial topics. Even just a lighter touch to writing is a winner for me. And Qvortrup makes this whole thing really amusing.

Sometimes, however, I had a hard time telling when he was exaggerating for humorous effect or just making a joke and when he was conveying actual information in a whimsical way. It doesn’t take away the enjoyment from the reading–it just makes it hard to know what you can repeat in conversation or cite in writing (you know, if you’re the kind of person who does that.)

So, what did I think about Great Minds on Small Things?

I had a great time reading this book–it’s a great mix of light reading with some interesting perspectives–and can easily be used as a launching point to further reading or research. “So-and-so used baseball to describe X economic principle, I want to see how that actually works out beyond this quick summary.” “Hanna Arendt’s personal story seems interesting, especially how it is expressed in Topic Y.” It’s also just fun to think about names you’ve read about (or maybe read) debating the type of breakfast that’s best for productivity or enjoyment of life.

I do think it’s best to dip in and out of the book, and not read from cover-to-cover the way I did. When I return, it will be to look at particular topics (not necessarily the ones I listed above).

My major complaint is the brevity of the book–I don’t think most of the entries needed to be longer, I just wanted more entries. Some letters only have one thing listed. Sure, it has to be difficult to find everyday things that philosophers have opined about, but now that Qvortrup has shown us some, it’s hard to believe there isn’t more to see.

Pick this one up, folks, you’ll have a good time.

3.5 Stars

Disclaimer: I received a copy of this book from Duckworth Books via NetGalley—thanks to both for this.
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Clearing the Deck III: Tweet-length thoughts about books I can’t find time to write about

By HCNewton

On February 5, 2024

In Audiobook, Comics, DC Smith & Kings Lake, Don Winslow, Faith Hunter, Fantasy, Fiction, Fletch, General Fiction/Literature, Gregory Mcdonald, Harry Bosch, Harry Dresden, Humor, Jim Butcher, M. W. Craven, Michael Connelly, Michael R. Underwood, Mystery/Detective Fiction/Crime Fiction/Thriller, Non-Fiction, Renée Ballard, Science Fiction, Theology/Christian Living, Urban Fantasy, Washington Poe, YA/MG/Children's Books

I did this last month to catch up up to 2023, but the backlog I’d accrued last year was too big for me. So here we go again. This doesn’t get me totally cuaght up, but it’s close enough. Hopefully it’ll be years before I have to resort to this again.

I frequently mention how looming Mt. TBR is getting for me, but what’s worse is my “To Write About” pile, I know I’m never going to catch up with that properly and it bugs me to no end. But in the interest of something being better than nothing, a dash of realism, and a heavy dose of self-care, I’m cutting myself some slack. This was painful to do, I was looking forward to writing about most of these, and I have so much that I want to say. But I’m just not going to get to them—and other books are starting to pile up, too. So, in 144 characters or less, here’s me cutting myself some slack.

(Click on the cover for an official site with more info)

	If I Understood You, Would I Have This Look on My Face?: My Adventures in the Art and Science of Relating and Communicating by Alan Alda Not sure how helpful this was–but it was quite entertaining & interesting. Hours of Alda’s narration–it almost doesn’t matter what he said.
	The Librarian of Crooked Lane by C.J. Archer, read by: Marian Hussey Great idea. Okay (ish) execution. Had to push myself to keep going more than once.
	The Bittlemores by Jann Arden So strange at times. The ending made all of the “why am I bothering” parts worth it. Capital Q-quirky and emotionally effective. Give it a try.
	Things My Son Needs to Know about the World by Fredrik Backman, read by: Santino Fontana Hilarious and touching. Backman seems more down-to-earth than expected–a great writer & a relatable dad. Should give this to my grandkid’s dad.
	That Old Cloak and Dagger Routine by Anne Louise Bannon Ummm…a cozy and fairly self-consciously chaste spy novel. Who knew that was possible? Wasn’t wowed, but intrigued enough to read more.
	The Deal Goes Down by Larry Beinhart A compelling, self-aware, action read. Really dug it, but not sure I’m 100% into the story’s wrap-up, but the denouement helped.
	Endangered by C.J.Box, read by: David Chandler Ehhhh…I liked this, I think. I’m not sure what to say about it (hence the months of silence from me, I guess)
	Strong Female Character by Fern Brady Funny and helpful look at one woman coming to terms with an ASD diagnosis, and how she got to it.
	Hammered by Lindsay Buroker, read by: Vivienne Leheny Good world, great protagonist/narrator. Decent introductory novel. I’ll be back for more.
	Vampire Weekend by Mike Chen Heckuva read. Words have failed me for a year with this one. The premise, execution, characters, plot–all typical Chen greatness.
	Spider-Man’s Bad Connection by Preeti Chhibber Not as good as book 1, but filled with everything I liked about it. Seemed more concerned about setting up the series arc than this book’s plot.
	Blue Like Me by Aaron Philip Clark, read by: Preston Butler III The mystery/police aspect of this series is great. The personal life material is less so. This author/narrator combo makes it worthwhile.
	Once Upon a Tome: The Misadventures of a Rare Bookseller by Oliver Darkshire If you’ve ever wondered what it’s like to work in an antiquarian bookshop or if you like quietly charming people talk about unusual occupations…
	The Storied Life of A.J. Fikry by Gabrielle Zevin, read by: Scott Brick So sweet, so heartwarming, so charming. This novel about booksellers in love–and Firkney’s adorable daughter–will steal your heart.
	Killing Me by Michelle Gagnon Great take on vigilante serial killers. Great turns and twists.
	Teen Titans: Robin by Kami Garcia, Art by: Gabriel Picolo Not the best in the series, but Garcia’s take on these characters is good enough to overcome that. I just wish these came out faster.
	Charlie Thorne and the Last Equation by Stuart Gibbs, read by: Emily Woo Zeller The problem with an impossibly smart characters is that the creators behind them aren’t that smart. The results are disappointing.
	Evil Valley by Simon Hall I like this series, I like the characters…didn’t think this was up to the author’s standards. Some great scenes and a compelling killer.
	Summer Hours at the Robbers Library by Sue Halpern, read by: Josh Bloomberg, Dara Rosenberg, Allyson Ryan Meandering. The major reveal was a major letdown. It was just intriguing enough to keep me listening, but I wish it hadn’t been.
	The Stench of Honolulu: A Tropical Adventure by Jack Handey What a waste of time (mine and the authors) and talent.
	Pieces of Eight by Peter Hartog I <3 this universe. I think this case was weaker, but the character moments, growth, and magic were so great that it didn't matter. I need more.
	Posthumous Education by Drew Hayes, read by: Kirby Heyborne Good to be back in Fred’s world. Not the best collection of episodes for the Vampire Accountant, but pleasant enough.
	The Last Ranger by Peter Heller, read by: Mark Deakins Feels like a CJ Box standalone that he abandoned because he couldn’t come up with an ending. Heller couldn’t either, but called it good anyway.
	The Door-to-Door Bookstore by Carsten Henn, read by: Raphael Corkhill, translated by Melody Shaw Schmaltzy but pure-of-heart. One central character’s motivation makes no sense. Ignoring that, it’s a sweet celebration of books/readers.
	Murder Your Employer: The McMasters Guide to Homicide by Rupert Holmes, read by: Simon Vance, Neil Patrick Harris Possibly too clever for its own good. I vacillated between reveling in it and utter disdain. It’s a mixed-bag that won me over in the end.
	Fixit by Joe Ide IQ and Dodson are back and better than ever. Who needs to say more than that?
	Thornhedge by T. Kingfisher, read by: Jennifer Blom Great prose in service of a solid modern take on Cinderella.
	Flood and Fury: Old Testament Violence and the Shalom of God by Matthew J. Lynch Helpful work on Divine Violence (how to think of it, how not to think of it or avoid the idea, either) and about the conquest of Canaan.
	But Have You Read the Book?: 52 Literary Gems That Inspired Our Favorite Films by Kristen Lopez How can a book with this premise be so dull? And snobbish, too.
	The Chinese Groove by Kathryn Ma, read by: James Chen Great characters, an okay story, but the payoff wasn’t there. The ending was bad enough to make me wish I hadn’t spent the time.
	Noirville: Tales From The Dark Side by Chris McVeigh 15 of the best short stories I’ve ever read. This is how Crime Fiction should always be.
	Grand Theft Astro by Scott Meyer, read by: Elizabeth Evans The Stainless Steel Rat with a contemporary twist. Meyer is capable of better, but I had enough fun (not sure I’m sold on the ending)
	The Eternity Fund by Liz Monument Dynamite dystopian adventure. Worth the $ just for the worldbuilding. The story and characters were even better–I’d relish a sequel.
	The Mostly True Story of Tanner and Louise by Colleen Oakley, read by: Hillary Huber It took me a long time to decide what this book was really about, but I enjoyed the trip. The destination was okay, too.
	The Raven Thief by Gigi Pandian See what I said about Spider-Man’s Bad Connection.
	Killers of a Certain Age by Deanna Raybourn, read by: Jane Oppenheimer, Christina Delaine Who doesn’t enjoy an octogenarian assassin? Who doesn’t love female assassins? A group of them out for revenge? Sure-fire fun.
	Vanished by Kat Richardson, read by: Mia Brown Good story, but felt underwhelmed by it all. I think it was me and my timing. not Richardson. I need to get back on this horse.
	She-Hulk, Vol. 1: Jen, Again by Rainbow Rowell A real winner from Rowell. I knew I should’ve started reading this series earlier. Good art, interesting arcs, & some real smiles were induced.
	How to Examine a Wolverine: More Tales from the Accidental Veterinarian by Philipp Schott, read by: Geet Arora A fun Veterinarian Memoir, with a lot of heart. James Herriot with more laughs and technology.
	The Green Ember by S.D. Smith, read by: Zach Franzen Maybe too much like Wingfeather Saga, but with rabbits instead of humans. Still, a good fantasy for the MG crowd.
	Don’t Hang Up by Benjamin Stevenson, read by: Luke Arnold, Sybilla Budd I can’t do better than Mike Finn did. Go read what he said. It’s why I listened.
	How I Won a Nobel Prize by Julius Taranto, read by: Lauren Fortgang Some good writing, but squandered for…I’m not sure really.
	The Marlow Murder Club by Robert Thorogood, read by: Nicolette McKenzie Decent cozy with an intriguing cast of oddball slueths.
	Questland by Carrie Vaughn Jurassic Park for RPG, SF, Fantasy, etc. fans. Been a Vaughn fan for years, but don’t know that I’ve had this much fun with one of her novels.
	All Systems Red by Martha Wells, read by: Kevin R. Free Oh, wow. I understand all the fuss over this series. I shouldn’t have slept on this–or the sequels like I have.
	Self Help by Ben H. Winters, read by: Wil Wheaton, Ron Perlman Cool concept. Great cast. Entertaining but not-entirely satisfying result. Worth the time. But not much more.

I’m Curious: Know Any Good Orcs?

By HCNewton

On January 26, 2024

In Humor, Miscellany

I was chatting with some people last night and one of them gave a quick recap of the lore behind Warhammer 40,000—by the way, if I had a spare year or two, I think I could get really into that—spending a lot of time on the Orcs (as one should if they’re half as entertaining as my friend described). I was then asked, what was my favorite depiction of Orcs in what I’ve read.

And I drew a blank. Sure, you’ve got Baldree’s Viv. Tolkien’s cannon fodder. Ewington has some fun Half-Orcs (and some good references to Orcs in general…I don’t think we see a full-Orc character, do we?). And, I can’t forget (although I initially did in this post to my shame) the fantastic singing and pirating Orcs in K.R.R. Lockhaven’s works. There were couple of other things I tried to remember (featuring ogres and goblins, it turns out). But that’s all I could come up with. I’ve intended on trying Stan Nicholls‘ series for quite some time, but we all know how that goes.

Now I have a hankerin’ to read a good depiction of an orc. Any suggestions? They could be the ravenous, blood-thirsty, murderous sort, a counter-intuitive pacifistic character, or a coffee and book aficionado (oh, wait, already mentioned one of those, please tell me there’s not more).

Silly Rhymes for Belligerent Children by Trace Beaulieu, Len Peralta (Illustrator): Wonderfully Weird Poems for Children of Most Ages

By HCNewton

On January 22, 2024

In Humor, YA/MG/Children's Books

Silly Rhymes for Belligerent Children:
A Yucky Big Book of Rainy Day Fun for Belligerent
Children & Odd Adults
with Nothing Better To Do

by Trace Beaulieu, Len Peralta (Illustrator)

DETAILS:
Publisher: Amorphous Productions
Publication Date: January 1, 2010 
Format: Paperback
Length: 45 pg.
Read Date: July 13, 2023

What’s Silly Rhymes for Belligerent Children?

The back of the book says:

You certainly don’t need to be a belligerent child to appreciate these silly rhymes by Mystery Science Theater 3000’s and Cinematic Titanic’s Trace Beaulieu – but you may learn a thing or two about handling infected pets or living dangerously through sledding. While the subject matter may make you a bit queasy, you’ll delight in the perfect storytelling encapsulated in each poem. Each selection is a dark and distasteful delight – a fascinating collection of raw honesty, cool understatement and looming tragedy, all brought to life by the whimsical illustrations by Len Peralta. Silly Rhymes for Belligerent Children isn’t the book you’ll keep on the bookcase for decades. It’s the book you’ll keep under your bed within easy reach so you can page through it long after you’ve committed all the poems to memory.

That’s pretty much what the book is—in the forward/Author’s Note, Beaulieu says these poems were inspired by daydreaming, and what better source could there be?

Well, these rhymes are meant for the kind of child I was, and frankly still am.

So don’t come here looking for nice little poems with fuzzy-wuzzy pictures of fluffy cute animals or impossibly happy youngsters fetching pails of water.

This book is intended for kids who hate that kind of stuff: older kids, of course, and adults with… well nothing better to do.

Some are short…some are longer (at least when it comes to page count), they’re all a great mixture of fun rhymes, great images, and eccentric (to say the least) ideas. Some are morbid (in a kid-friendly way), some are just strange, some are gross (in a kid-friendly way).

My One Complaint

There aren’t enough poems.

Or illustrations.

Or anything else.

I want more of everything in this book.

A Quick Word about the Art

WOW. The art is fantastic. Can you go through this book, ignore all the words in black type, and still enjoy it? Probably—some of the pictures won’t make sense without the black text, but yeah, I can see the book working if you think of it as a collection of odd illustrations (I’ve tried this twice, but keep slipping and ended up reading the poems, so I can’t promise).

They are the perfect augment/supplement/accompaniment to Beaulieu’s quirky rhymes and sensibilities.

So, what did I think about Silly Rhymes for Belligerent Children?

This is just silly fun. I, apparently, am an odd adult with nothing better to do, because I’ve read this a handful of times from cover to cover in the last few months and am pleased I did so each time.

You know how there are certain movies/shows that when you’re just mindlessly flipping through the channels (assuming you still do that) you have to stop and watch for at least a few minutes? This book is kind of like that. I cannot tell you how many times since I first read it that I’ve stopped to read a poem or two when I see this book. I’ve yet to pick it up without reading at least three poems. Generally more. And not always the same ones, either.

From the poems to the illustrations and all points in-between, I had a blast with this. I wish I knew about this back when it was first published, my kids would’ve loved it then. I probably can’t get them to slow down enough for it now. Hopefully in a few years.

Track down a copy and lose yourself in these pages. Your inner child (and inner odd-adult) will thank you.

3 Stars

Irresponsible Reader Pilcrow Icon

Clearing the Deck II: Tweet-length thoughts about books I can’t find time to write about

By HCNewton

On January 11, 2024

In Audiobook, Comics, DC Smith & Kings Lake, Don Winslow, Faith Hunter, Fantasy, Fiction, Fletch, General Fiction/Literature, Gregory Mcdonald, Harry Bosch, Harry Dresden, Humor, Jim Butcher, M. W. Craven, Matthew Norman, Michael Connelly, Michael R. Underwood, Mystery/Detective Fiction/Crime Fiction/Thriller, Non-Fiction, Renée Ballard, Science Fiction, Theology/Christian Living, Urban Fantasy, Washington Poe, YA/MG/Children's Books

I did this back in January 2020, and need to do it again.

I frequently mention how looming Mt. TBR is getting for me, but what’s worse is my “To Write About” pile, I know I’m never going to catch up with that properly and it bugs me to no end. But in the interest of something being better than nothing, a dash of realism, and a heavy dose of self-care, I’m cutting myself some slack. So I’m clearing the deck of everything from 2020-2022 that I haven’t made time for. This was painful to do, I was looking forward to writing about most of these, and I have so much that I want to say. But I’m just not going to get to them—and other books are starting to pile up, too. So, in 144 characters or less, here’s me cutting myself some slack.

How bad am I at keeping up with my To-Write-Titles? I put together the list of books for this post in January 2023. And am just now getting to it. I wish that was a joke.

(Click on the cover for an official site with more info)

	Battle Ground by Jim Butcher I just can’t talk about this one yet. I need more time. (yeah, they’re fictional characters, but I’ve spent too long with them to not be reeling)
	Desert Star by Michael Connelly Loved it while reading it. But I have more and more questions about all of it the longer I think about it. Not Connelly’s best but well worth it
	Dead Ground by M. W. Craven Not a typical Poe and Tilly case, just as good and gripping as the rest though.
	The Posthumous Memoirs of Brás Cubas by Machado de Assis, Flora Thomson-DeVeaux (Translator) A strange and somewhat humorous look at a ghost’s POV on his life. I want to read it a few more times to really get a handle on it. Heckuva read
	Nightwing: Year One Deluxe Edition by Chuck Dixon If there’s a better Nightwing writer out there, I’d like to see it. A great, great, great telling of his origin.
	Mythos by Stephen Fry Drags a little. Wish he could pick a tone for his retellings/commentary on the classic stories. Still, it’s Stephen Fry talking—worth the time.
	Heroes: Mortals and Monsters, Quests and Adventures by Stephen Fry See above, but felt it dragged a bit more.
	Teen Titans: Beast Boy by Kami Garcia, Gabriel Picolo (Penciller) A solid, believable update of Gar Logan’s backstory. Very promising follow-up to the Raven book. Really impressed with Picolo.
	Teen Titans: Beast Boy Loves Raven by Kami Garcia, Gabriel Picolo (Penciller) Bring the two together and it’s even better. I’m curious about the overall story, but would read just them being awkward together. Like the art.
	Missing Pieces: A Kings Lake Investigation by Peter Grainger, Gildart Jackosn (Narrator) The Murder Squad tackles a cold case and is as excellent as ever. I don’t know how to talk about this series w/o being redundant. I want more!
	Junkyard War by Faith Hunter, Khristine Hvam (Narrator) This was utterly fine. A lot didn’t go the way I expected. But I’m still in this series for the long haul.
	The Dime by Kathleen Kent One of the best first chapters ever. The rest is pretty good. Not sure I buy the motive for the murders, nor that I want to see what comes next.
	Batman: City of Crime by David Lapham If you buy (I can’t) Batman losing sight of his mission, this story about him recovering it is great. If you can’t…well, it’s pretty good.
	Bluebird, Bluebird by Attica Locke, J.D. Jackson (Narrator) A stunning work of fiction. Words fail me. A deeply compromised Texas Ranger tries to solve a potential hate crime and keep his job.
	Flynn by Gregory McDonald, Donald Corren (Narrator) I expected the Fletch narrator for some reason, but Corren won me over in minutes. One of my favorite novels of all-time. Great audio version.
	Son of Fletch by Gregory McDonald, Dan John Miller (Narrator) Oh, I wanted to love this. But I just liked it. I’ll probably hear Miller in my head anytime I read Fletch in print.
	Fletch Reflected by Gregory McDonald, Dan John Miller (Narrator) This is not the way the series should’ve ended. Some fantastic moments, but not sure it was worth it. Miller was solid as always.
	Last Couple Standing by Matthew Norman Norman’s best female characters (to date). Stupid premise, but it almost convinces me to like it by the end. Lots of great moments.
	Weakness Is the Way: Life with Christ Our Strength by J.I. Packer Packer’s great on 2 Corinthians and what Paul tells about weakness as a way of life for the Christian.
	The Monster in the Hollows by Andrew Peterson I’m not sure I loved the way the story went in this one, but I grew to appreciate it. Characters are still great.
	The Warden and the Wolf King by Andrew Peterson Whatever my misgivings about the last one, this was the right way to end the series. Just what I wanted (if mildly predictable)
	Deathstroke, Vol. 1: The Professional by Christopher J. Priest I prefer the version Wolfman and Perez initially told about his origin, but this ain’t a bad version. And I see why it was necessary. Good ’nuff
	There Goes The Neighborhood by S. Reed I stopped working with a book tour company because they wouldn’t let me be honest about this book ever. So I won’t be. Loved ALL of it. <3<3<3<3
	Percy Jackson’s Greek Gods by Rick Riordan, Jesse Bernstein (Narrator) If Percy Jackson edited D’Aulaires’s book you’d get this. A great way to introduce the myths to young readers. Bernstein is a spot-on Percy.
	Percy Jackson’s Greek Heroes by Rick Riordan, Jesse Bernstein (Narrator) See above, but with heroes.
	I Will Judge You by Your Bookshelf by Grant Snider If someone looked into my brain, took all of my ideas and feelings, and improved them, you’d get this book. But only one-third as good as this.
	All These Worlds by Dennis E. Taylor, Ray Porter (Narrator) Taylor and Porter are unbeatable together. This is funny (duh), and the grief and sadness are real. As is the anger. Is the ending too easy?
	The Fellowship of the Ring by J.R.R. Tolkien, Andy Serkis (Narrator) Serkis nails the narration (as you’d expect). Is there a better first book of a series in Fantasy?
	The Two Towers by J.R.R. Tolkien, Andy Serkis (Narrator) Serkis is tremendous here. This whole book is ridiculously good.
	The Return of the King by by J.R.R. Tolkien, Andy Serkis (Narrator) One day the pacing on this won’t surprise me. The book gets better every time. Serkis was phenomenal.
	Annihilation Aria by Michael R. Underwood Found family stars in this fun, space opera about archeologists fighting an empire.
	The Cartel by Don Winslow The best of the trilogy. Shocking. Moving. Gripping. All-too-real—if you told me this was non-fiction, I’d almost believe it. A true classic.

My Favorite Non-Fiction Books of 2023

By HCNewton

On January 4, 2024

In (Auto)Biography, Humor, News/Misc., Non-Fiction, Politics/Current Affairs

Favorite Non-Fiction 2022
My 2023 Wrap up continues and now we’re on to the Non-Fiction list. While I liked a number of works that didn’t make this list, I felt strange calling them a “favorite.” So, we have 7 instead of the nigh-obligatory 10. These are the ones that stuck with me through the year; the ones I cited in conversation; that I thought about when reading something else or watching something on TV. Yeah, there’s some overlap between this list and the audiobook list from yesterday—lately, most Non-Fiction books I work through are in audiobook format. So it makes sense, even if it makes this post seem like an echo.

As always, I only put books that I’ve read for the first time on this list. I don’t typically return to NF books (outside of looking up things for one or three points), but occasionally I do—for example, The Pleasures of Reading in an Age of Distraction by Alan Jacobs would get a permanent spot on this list, were it not for this rule.

(in alphabetical order by author)

Cunk on Everything: The Encyclopedia Philomena

by Philomena Cunk

My original post
If you’ve ever watched a video clip or a full episode of Philomna Cunk’s various shows/specials, you know just what you’re going to get in this Encyclopedia. If you don’t, finish reading this post and then go find some. Probably pound-for-pound the funniest thing I read this year. Utterly useless outside of that—in case that wasn’t clear. Whether you go from cover to cover, or dip into it here and there (probably for longer than you intend to)—these brief entries are almost certainly going to be a burst of entertainment for you. Not all of them are going to work for every reader—but never fear, just turn the page and you’re probably going to come across one that will.

4 Stars

Like, Literally, Dude: Arguing for the Good in Bad English

by Valerie Fridland, Narrated by Valerie Fridland, Joniece Abbott-Pratt, Keylor Leigh, Andrew Eiden, Christopher Ryan Grant, Ellen Archer, Eileen Stevens and Nicky Endres

I’m a sucker for entertaining books about language, grammar, etc. Fridland’s apologetic for “Bad” English drives my inner prescriptivist, up the wall—but she joins the growing number of writers who are sealing up that prescriptivit’s coffin. How good is this book? Her chapter (or maybe it was a section of a chapter) on “Um” and “Uh” was fascinating. If she can pull that rabbit out of a hat, imagine how good she can be when she talks about the use/overuse of “like,” the history of “Dude,” or the figurative use of “literally”—and so much more. I spent most of the time listening to this book just geeking out in a way that made me regret not becoming a sociolinguist myself.

4 Stars

Kneading Journalism: Essays on baking bread and breaking down the news

by Tony Ganzer

My original post
There’s just so much to commend about this book that this little paragraph isn’t going to come close to hitting it all. Partial memoir, small bread-recipe book, and some great insights into the state of journalism and what it means for our society. This is a great read—challenging, but in a friendly, welcoming way. Thoughtful and thought-provoking without being combative or overly critical. Ganzer has a point of view—and makes no claim about lack of bias here—but isn’t pushing a partisan outlook, just a pro-responsible press outlook. Brief, but not insubstantial.

4 Stars

Nasty, Brutish, and Short: Adventures in Philosophy with My Kids

by Scott Hershovitz

My original post
This was a great listen—Hershovitz is the kind of lecturer you want to pay attention to (or so imagine based on this). This book succeeded on multiple fronts: it was frequently amusing, if not downright funny; it was educational; it was insightful (even when I disagreed with what he did with the insights); it was thoughtful; it offered (largely by example, not being didactic) good parental advice; and kept this particular listener fully engaged throughout. Just what you want from an audiobook.

3.5 Stars

100 Places to See After You Die: A Travel Guide to the Afterlife

by Ken Jennings

My original post
A fun and informative traveler’s guide through afterlives depicted in Mythology, Religion, Books, Movies, Music and Theater, and from a few other sources. Jennings brushes against irreverancy, but (I think, I’m open to correction) stays on the respectful side. I absolutely had a blast with this—and learned quite a bit, too. It’s one that I’ll return to primarily as a reference, but I will appreciate the perspective and humor as I check my facts. The only problem I have with it is the lack of footnotes/endnotes—I want some source material!

4 1/2 Stars

Sundry Notes of Music: an Almost Memoir

by Ian Shane

My original post
Given how much I like Shane’s novels, it’s probably to be expected that I enjoyed getting some insight into the novelist. And as most of his novels are centered around music/people obsessed with music, it’s fitting that this memoir focuses on songs. There are parts of this book that are very funny—some bittersweet, some tragic, some simply thoughtful. Multiple essays will hit all of those points and more. They’re all engaging in various ways. Not one track on this playlist is going to leave you looking for the skip button.

4 Stars

The Worst We Can Find: MST3K, RiffTrax, and the History of Heckling at the Movies

by Dale Sherman

My original post
Sherman is a man who knows about riffing on movies and helps the readers get a better knowledge of it, too. Yes, the focus is on Mystery Science Theater 3000‘s original run (runs?), but he talks about the show’s predecessors and the various projects that have sprung from it, too. Even if you know a lot about the show, its performers, etc., you’re probably going to learn something. And if you don’t? You’re going to enjoy the dashes of perspective that Sherman gives about movies in general and MST3K specifically. Everyone who did what they could to keep circulating the tapes in the 90s is going to eat this book up. Fans of more recent vintage likely will, too.

4 Stars

Alexandra Petri’s US History: Important American Documents (I Made Up): A Mixed Bag That Features Plenty of Tasty Treats

By HCNewton

On December 20, 2023

In History, Humor

Alexandra Petri’s US History:
Important American Documents
(I Made Up)

by Alexandra Petri

DETAILS:
Publisher: W. W. Norton & Company
Publication Date: April 11, 2023
Format: Hardcover
Length: 324 pg.
Read Date: December 8-14, 2023

What’s The Inside Cover Flap of Alexandra Petri’s US History Say?

A witty, absurdist satire of the last 500 years, Alexandra Petri’s US History is the fake textbook you never knew you needed!

As a columnist for the Washington Post, Alexandra Petri has watched in real time as those who didn’t learn from history have been forced to repeat it. And repeat it. And repeat it. If we repeat history one more time, we’re going to fail! Maybe it’s time for a new textbook.

Alexandra Petri’s US History contains a lost (invented!) history of America. (A history for people disappointed that the only president whose weird sex letters we have is Warren G. Harding.) Petri’s “historical fan fiction” draws on real events and completely absurd fabrications to create a laugh-out-loud, irreverent takedown of our nation’s complicated past.

On Petri’s deranged timeline, John and Abigail Adams try sexting, the March sisters from Little Women are sixty feet tall, and Susan Sontag goes to summer camp. Nearly eighty short, hilarious pieces span centuries of American history and culture. Ayn Rand rewrites The Little Engine That Could. Nikola Tesla’s friends stage an intervention when he falls in love with a pigeon. The characters from Sesame Street invade Normandy. And Mark Twain—who famously said reports of his death had been greatly exaggerated—offers a detailed account of his undeath, in which he becomes a zombie.

What did I think about Alexandra Petri’s US History?

There are 76 pieces in this collection–not all are going to be winners. The odds against that are just too great. The tricky thing is (obviously) the ones I consider winners aren’t necessarily going to be the ones that you identify as winners–that’s probably because you have more refined tastes than me. I’m okay with that (and you should be, too). But I assumed that going in, so the question is: are there enough that you’re going to find funny to make reading all of them (or at least starting all of them before occasionally deciding to move on) worth it?

Absolutely.

Some of these start strong and then peter out–like some Saturday Night Live sketches. Some start strong and build from there. Some are duds from the beginning. And a few (to go back to SNL) leave you wanting Matt Foley to yell about the van down by the river one or two more times.

A few of the pieces that had me laughing were:

the spider in a certain Northhampton church who took umbrage at some of Edwards’ imagery
a poem about the other guy who rode the night Paul Revere did, but his name is hard to rhyme
a conversation about writing the song that became the tune for The Star-Spangled Banner
an abridgment of The Scarlett Letter
the man who bought his wife yellow wallpaper trying to get a refund
what would Gatsby have been like if Hemingway wrote it?
someone from Sun-Made trying to get Lorraine Hansbury to strike up a partnership
Build-a-Bear’s attempt to commemorate 9/11

I really could’ve gone on there, but I think between that and the above quotation, you get an idea. I could’ve come up with a similar list of ones that didn’t work for me–but why bother?

If any of the above topics/ideas seem like something you’d enjoy, you’re likely to have fun with over half of this book. When Petri is funny, she’s hilarious. When she’s not…well, there are words on the page that you can definitely read. Her highs are so high and her lows are…still above sea level. I don’t think anything was “bad” here, just some pieces that I really didn’t care for.

I’m glad I read this. You’ll probably be, too. I do recommend this, as long as you go in with open eyes.

3 Stars